Part 2: Bye bye Boris and fuck you very much!

Okay guys, I am rushing another post out very quickly because of the fast moving situation in the UK now as Boris Johnson has just resigned this morning and in this post, I shall attempt to answer some questions from those of you outside the UK about various aspects of British politics. This post will without the usual hyperlinks that I am so fond of as I am trying to rush this out as quickly as I can and those hyperlinks do take quite a while to add. Yeah let's dive right in. 

Q: How did you react when you heard the news of his resignation this morning? 

A: I jumped up from my computer, danced around the table and sang Lilly Allen's "Fuck you", you know the one with the chorus that goes "fuck you, fuck you very very much." Oh yeah, I'm celebrating today! I'm so delighted! Fuck off Boris! 

Q: Why did Boris quit? Just last night, he was so defiant, what changed overnight? 

A: Well it is hard to answer that question because we are not privy to what was going on last night at 10 Downing Street - given the sheer number of resignations that he had yesterday and the potential for even more resignations, it was clear that he couldn't hold on to power any longer but being Boris Johnson, he is delusional enough to think that he could somehow outmaneuver his opponents and survive as he has done before. Nonetheless, it was clear that if he didn't step down, then he would be removed from power by his own party who are sick and tired of the farcical situation. I'm not sure whom he would have listened to but people are guessing that either the Queen herself intervened or maybe it was his wife Carrie who told him to step down gracefully before being dragged out of office disgracefully. Of course, what the news hasn't covered were the anti-Boris protests in the streets of London as this dragged on and if he had stayed on a day or two longer, we could have seen massive anti-government and more specifically, anti-Boris protests all over the country given how much the country hates him now. So it's not just me, a lot of people think that he has been an absolute disgrace and embarrassment to the country. But yes, it is a stunning U-turn to have gone from being so defiant the day before to eventually giving up trying to hold on to power - it's a great example of hubris and I'm really enjoying this! 

Q: I know you're delighted he has resigned, but doesn't this whole situation reflect badly on democracy?

A: Whilst this whole situation has been chaotic, farcical and disgraceful, at least we got the outcome we needed and I only regret that he wasn't gone months ago. Let's compare this to the situation in Sri Lanka at the moment where you have an extremely corrupt government who has bankrupted the entire country and people in Sri Lanka are struggling to put food on the table, get medicines at hospitals or even get gas for their stoves in the kitchen. There have been massive street protests for months now all over Sri Lanka and guess what? That fucking corrupt president is still in power because they don't have a system of democracy that allows Sri Lanka to remove a corrupt, hated, incompetent president. That's a total disgrace and there are other dictatorships like Belarus where the government rigs elections to keep that evil dictator Lukashenko in power despite widespread protests. In fact, there is an extremely long list of countries where the people are very angry and disgusted with their rulers but have no way of replacing their rules so I am glad that the UK at least prove to the world that we know how to get rid of a very dishonest, corrupt and incompetent PM. Fuck off Boris.

Q: But Boris legitimately won the 2019 general election, that's how he gained power. 

A: Oh he told so many lies along the way, made so many promises that he had no intention of keeping and has no integrity whatsoever. Allow me to be very clear about this: the British public were not just stupid, they were fucking stupid - they were ridiculously fucking stupid to have believed his lies and I hope they have learnt their lesson. Oh please, you need to understand that this is an extremely unequal country - the rich are very rich of course but the majority of the country are uneducated, working class peasants who are barely literate and have no understanding of how politics works. We have a social class system which is pyramid-shaped, so there are very few elites at the top who enjoy plenty of wealth and privilege whilst the masses at the bottom of the food chain are poor and working class. However, it is a one person one vote democratic system, so whenever it is time for an election, politicians like Boris Johnson will simply lie to the masses at the bottom of the food chain, he will tell them what they want to hear, get their votes to secure his mandate then promptly go on to break all the promises he made. In the meantime, the working class voters are too dumb to remember what promises he made during the election campaigns as they are distracted by the latest football match or reality TV show. Johnson mastered the art of telling these poorly educated working class voters what they wanted to hear in order to win their votes, that's a very specific skill set which is quite different from the skills you need to be a good PM. 

Q: The rest of the world is looking on and laughing at the farcical situation, don't you feel embarrassed at all? 

A: Oh please, we have been embarrassed and humiliated ever since that clown Boris Johnson became our PM and that humiliation didn't start last week, it started three years ago. In fact, I imagine this was how some Americans felt when Trump became their president. You see, I never ever voted for the Conservative party, I have never given them a single vote in every single British election I have ever participated in since moving to this country. I didn't vote for Boris Johnson, I don't support him, in fact, for the record, I really fucking hate him - I think we've established that fact already. You see, I was brought up in a very Asian environment by very Chinese parents who think that you should offer those in authority unconditional respect even if they are lying pieces of shit like Boris Johnson and so for example, when it became clear that my nephew had a fucking awful teacher at school, my mother could not deal with the situation. Like her brain couldn't process that fact, I told her in plain English that my nephew has a terrible teacher who is really shit. My mother responded by saying that nephew "has to learn slowly." And I'm like, that's not the right response! You should respond by asking why such a terrible, incompetent teacher is allowed to continue working at that school, where are the checks and balances to make sure that teachers are held to a certain standard. Instead, my mother just assumes that anyone placed in a position of authority, be it as a school teacher or prime minister, should be respected regardless of the circumstances. Well I disagree with that and a lot of that is because my mother was a primary school teacher (now retired, she is very old) whilst I work in the world of banking. Nobody should ever be given unconditional respect. Never!

Q: Even if mistakes were made, shouldn't Boris be given the chance to put things right? 

A: He has already had too many chances and he has squandered every opportunity - in short, he has run out of goodwill from even within his own party. If I am hired by a company to do a job and I fail to deliver what is expected of me, then I would expect to face the consequences - I would be sacked if I really performed very badly. That's why I feel that a teacher and a prime minister alike should be expected to face punishment if they fail to deliver. I'm proud of the fact that at least the political system has punished him, it was long overdue. He was so awful at his job and needed to be sacked. 

Q: What do you think of the coverage so far by the media? 

A: I am fed up to be honest because the most of the media are trying too hard to be balanced. I know I risk going into an echo chamber here, I just wanna here people like Jonathan Pie swear about just how much we all fucking hate Boris and I could quite gladly sit in that echo chamber all day and scream, "yeah! We fucking hate Boris!" But of course the BBC has to try to find people who are die hard Boris supporters who are upset that he has resigned. And I'm like, why did you interview that woman? Why didn't you interview me and ask me how I feel about Boris Johnson? Why are you interviewing these uneducated working class idiots as if they actually understand anything about politics? Let's compare this to another story: when the Fukushima nuclear disaster happened in 2011, the BBC only interviewed experts like nuclear scientists who understood what happened and could provide an informed opinion about the nuclear physics affecting the nuclear plant. Can you imagine if they said, "we are now going to go live to Selly Oak in South Birmingham to interview Iris who is a 57 year old uneducated, working class housewife who knows nothing about nuclear power or nuclear physics but we are the BBC and we strive to cover the story from all angles, including giving these uneducated working class folks a voice. So Iris, can you tell us what you think about the situation in Fukushima please?" Yeah that may sound utterly ludicrous of course but this is exactly what is happening in the news right now. The people in government understand politics, the working class idiots don't - so why are you interviewing the latter? I want to hear what Nicola Sturgeon has to say, not Iris from South Birmingham! Who cares what a poor working class idiot Iris thinks?

Q: So there are still people supporting Boris at this stage? 

A: Actually yes. There are loads of uneducated, stupid, working class voters who believed his lies and that's one thing he excelled at - telling these voters exactly what they wanted to hear. He still has his supporters who are too uneducated and stupid to understand what has happened in the last few days and thankfully, even they cannot save him now. Ha!

Q: Why do you have an axe to grind with British working class people? 

A: Because it is people like them who allowed Johnson to become PM in the first place and we had our own version of Trump - that is a scary reminder of how right wing populists can use this kind of route to get into power. Trump and Johnson exploited the fact that these people are uneducated idiots who are easily manipulated; well-educated people like me can see through their bullshit and deceit but all these working class idiots believed everything Trump and Johnson said. I don't like stupid people. Johnson has done absolutely nothing for them, yet they are still loyal to him? 

Q: Can Boris stay on till October as PM? 

A: Oh he is going to shamelessly cling on to power for as long as he can but no, that's highly unlikely given that Labour have got a gun to the head of the Conservative party and they can pull the trigger at any time - allow me to explain. The MPs in the House of Commons can trigger a no confidence vote in the PM at any time and that would instantly trigger a snap election. Labour have every incentive to do that as this scandal with Boris Johnson clinging on to power is making the Conservatives extremely ugly is creating the best possible chance of a Labour victory in a general election in a generation. Good opportunities like that don't happen often and they can rely on many Conservative MPs who do want Johnson gone as soon as possible. This can be avoided if the Conservative party gets organized to get Johnson to leave his job as soon as next week - right now, Johnson has resigned and in doing so, he has managed to state the terms of his departure which includes staying on in his job till October. This is at best a polite request at this stage and there are serious consequences if the Conservative party is dumb enough to give him that courtesy but it won't happen. He has already agreed to step down, that's it - he is finished, he wields no more power, no one is going to kowtow to him anymore and give him what he wants. So he can make all kinds of requests at this stage but it is unlikely that his party will say yes to any of those requests. It is pointless having a lame duck PM in charge, there is no benefit to allowing him to stay till October. No, it will make the Conservative party even more unpopular to keep Johnson on as PM for that long. 

Q: Well, at least Boris didn't cling on till the bitter end like Trump,  who refused to acknowledge the results of the election that he lost and it led to his angry mob storming the Capitol. Holy shit. That was bad. 

A: We were expecting him to cling on until he was forced out. To be honest, his resignation today took us by surprise - he is like Trump in many ways, he lives in his own illusion whereby he is popular and invincible in spite of the fact that so many people in the country and even his own cabinet have told him that enough is enough, the game is over, you've truly fucked up. Trump's strategy was to divide and conquer, splitting America down the middle; he knew he couldn't win over everyone and be popular, he only needed just enough support to cling onto power. Mind you, Johnson only resigned as leader of the Conservative party rather than as PM, he wants to cling onto power until the Conservative party selects a new leader and that's a process that can take up till October given that you need to give the candidates time to prepare for the selection process. I think he is trying to at least negotiate some time to leave a more palatable legacy, he wants to be remembered for something good that he can do for the country between now and October rather than for his scandalous fall from grace in the last few days which saw his own party turn against him. But fuck that, we don't owe him anything and right now, his legacy is in the gutter covered in shit and I would rather we keep it that way. He had his chance to be a good prime minister but he well and truly fucked up - that's his legacy. He will always remain a very divisive character, I'm sure we will look back and think, "how the fuck did this country elect someone so corrupt and incompetent? What took us so long to get rid of him? And why did we put up with his corruption and sleaze for so long?"

Q: So what next for the UK? 

A: There's an overwhelming sense of relief that this scandalous episode is coming to an end and not a moment too soon. We have so many problems in this country: there's a cost of living crisis, there is a nasty war raging on in Ukraine, inflation has never been so high in a generation. The sooner we have a functioning government without Johnson the sooner we can get on with solving these problems. These problems aren't going away just because we've been distracted with politics recently, these are serious issues that the government still needs to deal with and solve urgently. 

Q: Who will be the next PM then? 

A: That's a good question because the selection process is only from within the Conservative party, so that's a group of approximately 160,000 active members of that party. I'm not a member, so I don't get a say, I can't participate in that process. Mind you, I could join by simply paying £25 a year but no, I have never supported them. So the early polls that have been conducted amongst those eligible to vote in this process have indicated that some of the more low profile Conservative ministers like Ben Wallace and Penny Mourdant are the front runners - this surprised me. I was literally like, what? Who? I had to look them up on Google for crying out aloud, I suppose the only thing good about having such a low profile in this case is that they have not been embroiled in some sleazy scandal yet, so they have a clean record for now and that can't be a bad thing! High up on that list in third place is Rishi Sunak who is very high profile indeed but has had his fair share of scandals. The Conservative party will have to decide if it is better to pick quite a low-profile new leader who is relatively unknown in the run up to the next general election against Keir Starmer who by now, is a veteran politician, leader of the opposition and is a much stronger opponent than the last leader of the Labour party Jeremy Corbyn, who quite frankly was also another fucking idiot. Oh I hate both Boris Johnson and Jeremy Corbyn - this is called being objective rather than blindly giving your loyalty to a political party. Given that Keir Starmer will be a formidable opponent, the Conservatives will need to pick a strong leader to face him off at the next elections. Will a relative unknown like Wallace or Mourdant be able to take on Keir Starmer? I don't think that would prove to be a good strategy for them. 

Q: What do you think of Keir Starmer? 

A: That's a tough question actually because it's like saying, "do you support Biden?" Of course I totally supported Biden when he was running for president and celebrated when he won, then I realized wait a minute, I didn't know that much about him apart from the fact that he wasn't Trump and I fucking hated Trump so much. So we have the exact same situation here, I don't know enough about Starmer but if he was in an election against Johnson, then I would support Starmer 100% not because I like him but just because I really fucking hate Johnson so much. Getting rid of Boris Johnson before the next election is actually good for the country because we can now avoid what happened in America, where Biden won by default simply by not being Trump who was hated by so many. Even if Starmer is going to win and become our next PM, I want him to be at his best, I want him to fight hard for that victory rather than practically have a walkover because everyone fucking hates Johnson as much as I do. Good luck to him, he would make a very good PM.

Q: Is the UK ready for a non-white PM? 

A: There are currently a few candidates who are Asian: Suella Braverman, Sajid Javid, Nadhim Zahawi and Rishi Sunak. I think the only one on that list who has a realistic chance is Sunak but I really don't see how his skin colour or ethnicity has anything to do with it. He is so crazy rich, he has far more in common with the elites in this country who are also crazy rich - wealth like that has nothing to do with skin colour at all. Both Javid and Sunak are certainly infinitely richer than the other white candidates in the process. But of course, when you get the 160,000 members of Conservative party to pick the next leader, would they openly support diversity and then still pick a white leader when they actually vote? Well we shall see, the thing is Rishi Sunak isn't particularly 'Asian' anyway the same way I'm not particularly Chinese as I am so assimilated I have far more in common with my rich, middle class friends here in London than other migrants from China or Singapore. Now if Sunak was a first generation immigrant with a very strong Indian accent, then that would be a different story - that would limit his appeal with some voters but even well-educated, rich Indians in India do not speak English with an Indian accent. Sunak's accent is more a reflection of his extremely rich and privileged upbringing which meant that he was taught how to speak English properly, so he strikes me as posh and rich, rather than Indian. But hey, that's just my point of view, I'm not sure the rest of the country will agree with me as I am not your typical British voter. 

So there you go, that's it from me on this topic. Once again, I rushed this out as this was a breaking story that was time sensitive. I found the coverage in the media frustrating because it was so sanitized and it censored the hatred people felt against Boris Johnson. Margaret Thatcher was so hated that when she died, many people in the country held street parties as a final 'fuck you' to her as they celebrated her death. People up and down the country have been doing a lot of tasteless and very offensive 'fuck you Boris' and 'fuck off Boris' gestures today but these rarely get covered in the mainstream media. So I hope my brutally honest coverage here will give you a different side of the story that you may not have gleamed in the news wherever you are. Please feel free to leave a comment below and many thanks for reading.