Seth & Olive 2.5
Matt & Redmond 3
Becca & Floyd 3.5
Vanck & Ashton 4.5
Brooke & Scott 5
Liz & Michael 5.5
Tara & Joey 6.5
Shamir & Sara 7
London & Logan 8
Jessie & Francesca 9.5 (eliminated)
I would take these rankings with a pinch of salt as the teams were so close - there was a mad scramble at the pit stop with a cluster of teams just seconds apart from 5th to 8th. Even 1st and 2nd were incredibly close: Liz & Michael took a taxi whilst Vanck & Ashton chose to run to the pit stop, who knows, had Liz & Michael's taxi met with one more red light, the results would have been the other way around. It is clear though that despite not winning in Brazil, my pick of the two strongest teams are still statistically at the top of the table. I do however, believe that Becca & Floyd as well as Vanck & Ashton are definitely a force to be reckoned with as well. At the end of leg 1, I was convinced it was a two horse race - now I am less convinced having seen how things have panned out in Sao Paulo. Statistically, London & Logan are the weakest team statistically now, but they didn't stand out as the team who had struggled the most in either legs so far (we'll talk about Booke and Shamir later, I promise). Go figure - that's statistics for you.
The game is getting nasty!
We saw first two acts of malice in this season: firstly, Matt & Redmond broke their promise to Vanck & Ashton about the helicopter sign up - was it that evil of them to have done that? If you weren't prepared to keep your promise, then don't agree to something like that in the first place as it just makes you look like a douchebag with no honour. Were Vanck & Ashton a bit naive to believe that another team would agree to something like that? Probably, but I am glad they have learnt their lesson not to be so trusting. Then Sara deliberately misleads Jessica & Francesca at the Roadblock - yes that was devious, but she was desperate to stay in the race and Shamir wasn't making it any easier for her. In times of desperation, people will do anything to avoid elimination. I doubt Sara was proud of what she had done, but if she didn't do it, who knows, she may have faced elimination given the way Shamir struggled with that roadblock. (Yes I'll get to Shamir shortly, I promise!) The race does bring out the best and worst of people - remember the evil gays "team Guido" all the way back in TAR season 1? We all love a good villain, I loved team Guido. This is not a popularity contest like Survivor. Sometimes you just have to do whatever you have to do to win or avoid elimination.
 |
| Will you lie on the race, knowing it will make you enemies? |
What the hell happened at the travel agent in Panama?
This is the bit I don't understand - the first team departed at 11:16 pm but the travel agent opened only at 5 am the next day, which meant that all the teams were rushing into the travel agent as it opened and the order they left in seemed pretty random. Despite being a fluent Spanish speaker, Shamir didn't manage to get his team didn't get on the first flight. That stank of poor planning to me, it rather unfair that teams who did well in leg 1 lost any advantage they had because the teams were bunched up at the very first location. If you were going to get a travel agent to specially open at 5 am in the morning for the filming, then you could have gotten them to open all night just to allow teams to casually stroll in, book their flights whilst more or less keeping the same order they finished the last leg. That would seem more fair to me, yes it is a race but I think the concept of fairness is important to the viewer. I'd like to see a team penalized or punished for doing something silly - a bad decision, a bad judgement call, being reckless or forgetful, being unable to ask for directions in Spanish or read a map - but to end up at the back of the pack just because of pure dumb bad luck, that's not in the spirit of TAR, is it? Jess & Francesca arrived last in Brazil and just couldn't make up the time deficit - somewhat unfair perhaps? They were doomed the moment their flight was booked.
It looked quite cold in Sao Paulo!
Yes indeed folks, the teams were there in June and as Brazil is in the southern hemisphere, that's winter for them. It can get down to about 5 degrees Celsius in the winter months in Sao Paulo, though it has a climate similar to that of Los Angeles and Sydney with winter mornings that can feel decidedly chilly. I guess after the Rio 2016 Olympics, we all have this image of a tropical Brazil bathed in warm sunshine, with beautiful people on Copacabana beach surrounded by coconut trees even during the winter months in Rio. Well, Sao Paulo is further south than Rio de Janerio and has a cooler climate. There was one samba dancer in quite a skimpy costume - I wonder just how cold she must have felt!
Whilst the Samba detour was a great choice to showcase Brazilian culture. I thought the assembly task at the gym was a poor choice. You want to showcase the most interesting aspects of the destination's culture, or at least highlight something somewhat unusual that is somewhat entertaining or educational. Brazil is a poor country where some poor people struggle to make ends meet and they make a gym out of stuff found in a scrap yard, was that the best you could do? It was an odd choice by the producers, I'm not sure how my Brazilian friends would feel about that. The last time TAR visited Sao Paulo in season 9, the detours were more interesting and this is hardly the first time TAR has done some odd detours in poor locations. The worst offender in this category was when they visited Singapore in TARA S5 E7: they were in one of Asia's most vibrant, exciting cities and they did a roadblock in a car park building. The task was to fly and land a drone accurately on a target, but I could have thought of a thousand more beautiful locations to have done it than a grey, concrete car park building. You wanna do an attention-to-detail assembly task in Sao Paulo, fine - but do it in a far more beautiful setting, showcasing the beauty of the city to the viewers.
"Pain is temporary, elimination is forever."
Okay, let's talk about Brooke and Scott. They struggled in Sao Paulo and many tears were shed by both - firstly, Brooke panicked and jumped out of the taxi when they were stuck in traffic. She then tripped and then whined about her elbow for the rest of the leg. Poor Scott did most of the heavy lifting in the detour with the patience of a saint whilst Brooke whined incessantly. How he managed to put up with her, I have no idea. Did she not realize the effect of her behaviour on her race partner? I don't know if she is single/married/dating/divorced (CBS didn't release that information, I suppose it isn't relevant to the race) - but when you're in a long term relationship, you become a lot more aware about things like that whilst people who are single perhaps are less aware of it. I was beginning to feel sorry for Scott, then he started to whine like a baby about his fear of heights. Dude, haven't you watched TAR before? Haven't you seen the many challenges involving bungee jumping, parachuting and other height related fear-factor type challenges? Surely when you signed up for TAR, you should have expected to have done something like that - he seemed to be taken by shock that he had to do something he disliked. Duh. Now I am really hoping these two self-destruct and get eliminated soon as they are becoming so annoying - they are my least favourite team at this stage.
This is the part you've been waiting for. Yes I work in corporate finance today but did I also mention that I am a former national champion gymnast who has also worked as a wirework specialist/stunt double when I was younger? Put me in a harness today and I'll be happy to jump off a building. I last did wirework when I was one of the stunt artistes in the Mr Bean Snickers ad that I hope most of you have seen, given that it was shown in most countries around the world. I have also included a short Youtube video from some years back to show you what my wirework abilities are. I'm about to turn 41, I'm not young anymore and my stuntman days are behind me now, but yes I have had a lot of experience doing stunt work with different kinds of harnesses in my younger days. Most importantly, after working with some of the best riggers in the UK, understand the health & safety aspects of using this kind of equipment to ensure that men in harnesses do not suffer any undue pain or discomfort to their testicles. I note that five guys did the window cleaning challenge (Scott, Redmond, Seth, Logan + Shamir) but only poor Shamir got into trouble! So what went wrong then?
 |
| An old photo from my stunt work days |
Phil mentioned that the harness can slip, even with professionals. Well, I beg to differ Phil. Accidents can happen with stuntmen when they do complicated, dangerous stunts - but this was a window cleaning task: all Shamir had to do was abseil down the side of the building without changing the position he was sitting in. If his harness was fitted properly, his balls should have never been trapped like that. Despite the kind of stunts I have performed in a harness, I have never ever trapped my balls in the strap on the harness before! It is necessary to wear the harness extremely tightly like a corset, yes that is very uncomfortable indeed, but that's the only sure way to ensure that the straps stay in place, do not slip and trap your testicles. I watched the episode again and traced the moment where it all went terribly wrong: Shamir had his harness loosened on his second attempt to be more comfortable in it - now, that should never have been allowed! This happened right after Shamir's failed first attempt, so here's the transcript from the episode:
Shamir: That's the most painful thing in the world. Oh my god, this harness is riding up parts, that shouldn't be.
Sara: Shamir is like, in a bad mood right now (blah blah blah etc, not relevant).
Shamir: I think my testicles are swollen. For real. This thing's way too tight at the bottom (mumbling) legit.
Rigger: We're gonna... just ease it up a bit.
Hell no! If I was the rigger, I'd tell him, "I know it is uncomfortably tight, but if I eased it up a bit, you risk making the situation far more dangerous for your testicles. If it is tight, then the straps will stay where they are - yes it will hurt your upper thighs and buttocks, but at least your balls are safe. So no Shamir, I am going to make it even tighter, not ease it up." The rigger did the wrong thing - he listened to Shamir, someone who has never been in a harness before, rather than default to his training! That was appalling. This resulted in the harness slipping and trapping Shamir's balls. I don't blame Shamir - I completely blame the rigger. When I did wirework, I always listened to the professional riggers because they are the experts and you are putting your life in their hands. Shamir didn't trust his riggers and made demands - the rigger didn't have the balls (pun intended) to stand up to a reality TV contestant throwing a tantrum, you can see where it all went wrong. Any man will tell you that any kind of accident involving your testicles will hurt like hell. The rigging crew in Sao Paulo let him down - please don't blame Shamir for what happened to his balls, okay?
 |
| Here's another pic of me in a harness. |
But still, the way Shamir behaved at the pit stop...
However, he did throw a total tantrum at the pit stop - that was when I felt incredibly sorry for Sara. That was uncalled for and he made himself look really bad there. Yes you had problems with your balls on TAR, but sulking about it is just going to make the fans on social media mock you even more. If he had learnt to laugh at himself, then the fans would have been more forgiving. I thought they were a strong pair initially (pun intended), but having seen how Shamir totally crumbled under stress (regardless of the circumstances), it is clear that this pair are struggling to work together. Let's not forget that these teams barely know each other, but already it is clear that both Shamir & Sara as well as Brooke & Scott do not work well together. Vanck & Ashton on the other hand, seemed to have overcome their initial struggles and have found a way to work well together, doing extremely well in Sao Paulo. Even Liz & Michael admitted that they are quite different characters, yet they have also shown that they are capable of working well together too. Can you imagine if Shamir and Brooke paired up? Now that would have been the worst possible pairing amongst this lot. I hope Shamir realizes that he owes Sara and apology for the way he has been treating her, but she also needs to understand that any kind of injury or pain to a man's testicles is no joke and needs to be taken very, very seriously. It's a very long flight to Zanzibar in Tanzania for leg 3, hopefully it'll give them some time to rest and recover.
My prediction for leg 3, Zanzibar.
Well, it is going to depend on what kind of detours and road blocks awaits them in Zanzibar! TAR last visited Zanzibar in season 11 leg 6 way back in 2006 (well it was filmed in 2006, aired in 2007). If it is going to be anything quite physical, then clearly Seth & Olive as well as Matt & Redmond will do much better than the other teams. However, if it is something that requires attention to detail (it isn't clear if they are assembling/fixing the furniture or just carrying it), then Vanck & Ashton are clearly better at that. We are already told to expect another big fight from team Shamir & Sara, but I'd be surprised if Brooke wouldn't drive Scott utterly nuts again in Zanzibar. Furthermore, there is the double U-turn and the stronger teams will have a target on their backs. The team that should feel safe would be Becca & Floyd because they have the Express Pass - but do the other teams know who has the Express Pass? You would want to U-turn the team that has the Express Pass just to force them to use it, so they no longer have that advantage. So my pick for winners: Seth & Olive or Matt & Redmond. And for elimination in leg 3: Shamir & Sara or Brooke & Scott.
No comments:
Post a Comment