Thursday, 26 December 2013

Degree choice Q&A: Light Blue Skies' options

I have said this before and I'll say it again: I love answering your questions! Today's question is from my reader Light Blue Skies (I shall shorten that to LBS in this article okay?) who asked me:

You really enlightened me with your blog. Can you tell me what can I do with a political science degree? Thanks.
I intend to study Political Science at NUS.I am considering Political Science because I really love analyzing current events and history, and for that, I have an interest in politics and government so I have an interest in Political science. My third choice would be sociology because I find it interesting to analyze people and their behavior.
I want to be a journalist but Singapore lacks press freedom as well so I don't think I will enjoy being a journalist in Singapore. Btw my parents really hate it when I comment on Singapore politics because somehow I am be marked for life if I do so. I have thought of migration to fulfill my dreams but there are probably thousands of job applicants like me fighting for the same job and as a foreigner, I will not have an advantage over them.

I have thought of giving up my dream as a journalist but I do know know where I can apply my passion for analyzing sources, understanding and writing about them into any other job. 
OK that's plenty of food for thought LBS and thanks for that question. It is actually a very interesting question because I have been there myself years ago - I remember being a student at VJC all those years ago thinking, oh damn, now what? What university should I go to, what degree should I choose, what career options will I have? My parents weren't any help when it came to career advice and I can feel that LBS is in the same situation! This is why I am so glad I am in a position to help LBS - so for what's it's worth, here's my take on the issue.

Now forgive me if it seems like I am not directly answering your questions but I promise you I will get to the bottom of the matter by the end of this post. My initial thoughts when I read your comment was, "you're not asking the right question." In an ideal world, you should be know what you want to do in the long run - you should be able to answer this question, "picture yourself on your 30th birthday - what kind of career will you have then? What kind of company will you be working for? What kind of money would you like to be earning? What would you have achieved by that milestone?" Once you have answered those questions, then I would say, "right, you need to select a degree which will help you get to where you want to be, your choice of degree has to be made in that context." 
Do you have the right degree?

Of course, if you knew the answer to that question of what kind of career you want, then it would make life a lot easier - but reality is often a lot more complex and messy. At the age of 18, I only had some vague idea about what I would like to do. I had to change career paths a few times in my 20s - I simply didn't know what I wanted to do and there was a lot of trial and error in finding out what I didn't want to do in order to discover what I want to do by process of elimination. I suppose it is a blessing in disguise that I am by nature a very adaptable person and a quick learner, so I am more than happy to be jump on a different career ladder and face a steep learning curve if necessary (whilst some people would find that challenge just too daunting). So yeah, it is perfectly okay to say, "I don't quite know what I want to do or am going to do yet - I will figure it out in due course. In the meantime, I need to go to university and do a degree that will serve me well in a wider context, so I can keep my options open for now." 

So back to LBS, you need to consider this: there are things we like to do, but a job involves us being paid to provide a service. I can probably list you many things that I enjoy doing (and am good at) but I have to consider if I want to make a career out of it - let me give you an example. I was a very good gymnast when I was younger (I still enjoy it today, see video below) - I have even gone on to get my coaching qualification so I am now a qualified gymnastics coach. However, I am not prepared to go into coaching full time because the money is just not good. It is however, something I will keep a part of my life but I am just not going to depend on it to pay my bills nor am I going to base my career on it. There will be things like that in your which you may enjoy but you will not turn into a career. 
Here's the bad news: you may love analyzing current events and history - but will someone pay you to do that for a living? In Singapore, that is tricky and highly unlikely. There are only so many newspapers in Singapore which will hire full time journalists - Straits Times, Today, New Paper, Business Times and My Paper. Then you have to think about writing in Mandarin, Tamil or Malay if you are unable to get a job as a journalist with one of those main English language newspapers. The number of magazines with any kind of political content is negligible - when was the last time you actually read a serious piece about politics in 8 Days, Female or Singapore Tatler? The fact is, these magazines focus mainly on a certain area of interest (motoring, fashion, sports, health, travel, entertainment, parenting etc) and from the list I found here, none of them are specifically about politics and even if a magazine like The Asian Banker Journal or Expat Living may once in a while publish an article about politics, they are simply not going to hire a full time political analyst to write articles about politics/current affairs for them.  There simply is no market for it in Singapore - it is not what the locals want to read about. This is a simple function of supply and demand. 

Even if you can get a job with say, the Straits Times, anything you write will be highly controlled by your editor and anything that is anti-government or anti-PAP is going to be censored. This is Singapore, anything within the SPH umbrella is going to be pretty much the mouthpiece of the government and this is unlikely to change in your lifetime. Let's get real here. So let me be harsh and brutally honest: you're totally barking up the wrong tree in terms of looking at political journalism in Singapore. It's not going to happen. In Singapore, yes there is the alternative media space where bloggers and activists say what they want on the internet and criticize the government if they wish - there's nothing to stop you from participating in Singaporean alternative media LBS. However, none of us involved in the Singaporean alternative media space make a living from it - if you want to make journalism your career, you will have to work for someone like the Straits Times or New Paper and accept their working conditions. 
Let's say you are willing to work for SPH and accept their editorial conditions and censorship, how many political writers can they realistically employ? There are five main English newspapers in Singapore, how many jobs are there? I spoke to a friend of mine who works at TNP and his reply was, "The TNP is a tabloid, we don't have a political desk, we leave the serious political debates to ST. Likewise for My Paper and Business Times, My Paper is very light on news content and Business Times steers clear of politics - it is just all about business. I don't know about Today but they're part of MediaCorp anyway so it's not like they're independent. I don't know exactly how big ST's political desk is - the political editor there is Warren Fernandez, he is also the overall editor in charge.The number of ST journalists working on political stories is likely to be very small. I can't give you a precise number as ST doesn't publish a full list of their staff online, but it is going to be less than 5 and unless one of them retires, quits or is killed, there are no vacancies."

It is not unheard of for journalists to have internal transfers - so for example,when my sister worked at ST, she started out working on their crime desk but then found it too daunting after she was once threatened by a criminal not to publish his name in the newspaper outside the court. Her photographer colleague was assaulted by a criminal whilst trying to protect her - so she requested a transfer to do something which wouldn't bring her face to face with criminals all the time. After all, she was a journalist, not a crime fighter. She then transferred to work on their health desk, where she dealt with medical professionals instead on health stories and she found going to hospitals a lot less stressful than going to court. So with that in mind, you're also competing with other existing employees of ST who may be waiting for their chance to transfer onto the political desk and have already proven themselves within the organization.
You'll need a lot more than a degree to prove yourself to SPH.

So if you want to work for Mr Warren Fernandez at ST, you must impress him. The man read PPE at Oxford and then got his masters from Harvard - he was a double scholar and intellectually, the man is every Singaporean parent's wet dream: he is not just a scholar, but has clearly proven that he is so much more intelligent than 99% of Singapore. How the hell do you impress a man like that? Well going to Oxford on a scholarship would be a good start - I'm sorry but reading political science at NUS is just not good enough. Tough, I know, but when there are so few vacancies on his team, you have to be amongst the very best in Singapore in order to fight for his attention. I am sorry to be so cruel and blunt but someone has got to break the news to you and I'd rather it be me, because I know the majority of people in life would be too nice to discourage you like that. You'll need a hell of a LOT more than a degree from NUS to impress SPH if you want a job with them - I hope you've something else in your life to make them go, "ooh check out this applicant, she's done something impressive with her life." A degree from NUS is just not enough, okay?

As for working abroad, you have a really defeatist attitude. Please don't admit defeat before even rising to the challenge! Good grief, I remember myself having that attitude when I was at university and then at work, but I proved myself wrong over and over again. Okay, so there may be a couple of things you're not used to culturally, but as long a you're a fast learner, observant and willing to adapt to new working environments, there's nothing to stop you from competing with the best in any country. Heck, even if you do end up working in Singapore, being local doesn't mean that you will automatically fit into the working environment. It is a lot more complex than you think.
That's me working in Belgium in January 2013

You know what my toughest challenge was in terms of trying to fit into a new environment after all my years of working in so many countries around the world? It was during NS, national service (could I just point out please that LBS is female and doesn't need to serve NS).  It was all about being thrown in a totally unfamiliar environment and having to work with people you don't know and don't like - despite the fact that I grew up in Ang Mo Kio and spoke Singlish, Mandarin, Hokkien, Cantonese and Malay, I still found it hugely challenging in my first year in NS to fit in. Ironically, it taught me the importance of being flexible, adaptable, observant to those around me, so I can mould myself to fit into any kind of working environment - that lesson served me very well years later when I was working in Europe and the Middle East. So yeah, I actually did learn something useful during my national service, how about that?

So LBS, listen carefully. Being local will NOT give you any advantage when it comes into fitting into a Singaporean company because every company is unique in terms of its office politics and it is about learning about the unique circumstances that governs the way an office operates (pecking order, rivalries, how to relate to your boss, how to claim credit for the work you've done, whom you can trust, whom you should be wary of, whom you should form alliances with, keeping your friends close and your enemies closer, that kinda shit). At the end of the day, it is about being good with people and if you have that skill, you can thrive in any company anywhere in the world whether you're in Shanghai, Seattle, Sydney or Singapore. If you're crap with people and are like a bull in a china shop, if you're emotionally autistic, unable to read the emotions of your co-workers, then you will suffer even if you are working in a company that is on the street in Singapore where you grew upI have already written a lot about working abroad and will be writing more about it shortly, so look out of my latest article on the issue.
That's me during a work trip to Wales last year.

As for working as a journalist abroad, you face the exact same challenges as you do in Singapore. In a city like London, okay we have a lot more English language newspapers but you are also competing with top scholars from UCL, Oxford and Cambridge who are looking to work for them and the competition is equally stiff. The fact that we have a far more liberal atmosphere with more freedom of speech doesn't change the fact that you will be fighting with so many brilliant scholars for the same jobs. What can I suggest? Have you thought about Oxford or Cambridge rather than just settling for NUS? I mean, there's nothing wrong with NUS but if you want to put yourself in a field as competitive as journalism where there are so few jobs (compared to say banking or engineering where there are so many more jobs), then you're shooting yourself in the foot face by going to NUS. If you are narrowing your field down to political journalism in Singapore, woah - there are under ten such jobs available in Singapore compared to thousands of vacancies in banking, teaching, engineering, sales & marketing, media and IT. Okay, my sister went to NUS and did get a job with ST for many years - but that was years ago back in the early 1990s and the population of Singapore back then was much smaller, Singapore is far more competitive today and you need to find a way to outshine the rest of the competition.

SPH gives out undergraduate scholarships to the brightest and best students in Singapore so as to groom them to be excellent journalists - I have a friend who is currently under this scheme and they are extremely generous to her, sending her to one of the top universities in America. If you can get yourself that scholarship (hopefully you will have results that are nothing less than straight As), then you're pretty much guaranteed a fruitful career in journalism in Singapore It is such a brilliant scheme. If not, well, your chances will be extremely slim at best. Oh and my friend who is the scholar was also a former gymnast who represented Singapore internationally for many years (before she was forced into retirement as a result of injury) and she did ace her A levels - so it was this combination of proving herself both academically and outside the context of academia that won her that great SPH scholarship.
Can you stand out from the crowd and rise above the competition?

As for what you can do with a political science degree, well, "not that much" is the honest answer within the context of Singapore. In the UK at least, some people are able to get a career in politics : lobbying, think tanks, QUANGOs, PR for political parties for elections, working directly for political parties, research, the civil service and political journalism - you can find a longer list here. But that is because we have true multi-party politics here and the fight amongst the parties is very intense - there is fierce rivalry and this in turn, generates many jobs!

In Singapore, the situation is very different. There is little political rivalry - the PAP know that they are going to hold on to power no matter what happens, so they don't need a huge PR machine like the political parties in the UK or US - that means far fewer jobs generated. The opposition parties are poorly funded and not very well organized, relying mostly on volunteers as they just cannot afford to hire anyone. There is no shortage of volunteers with the PAP anyway so your chances of getting a paid job related to politics in Singapore is extremely low.
Do we even need a degree then to enter the working world? I don't think so, but my opinion runs contrary to the trend in Singapore, where everyone is desperate for a degree. A degree from NUS will at least prove to employers that you're smart enough to get into NUS and as long as you graduate with a 2:1 (second upper) or first class, it will also prove to them that you're hardworking, tenacious and a willing learner. Allow me to explain what I mean by "a willing learner": doing a social science degree means taking an issue and analyzing and presenting your understanding of the issue in a format that your professors at university will find acceptable. If you do not do things the way they want, they will fail you. For example, any kind of qualitative or quantitative analysis will have to be clearly and neatly presented and would have to meet an acceptable standard, omitting any of basic requirements when it comes to backing up your research is not acceptable. You will also need to cite your references and sources for any case studies you have quoted in a standard format - you cannot just plagiarize or copy from others in your essays and thesis.

What does that prove? It shows that you're capable of following complex instructions! Yeah, just that. But you'll be amazed the number of people I've worked with over the years who cannot follow instructions despite me or the boss repeating the instructions to them over and over again (like how did these people get through university?). Some people just don't listen and don't pay attention and such people won't be able to survive 3 years at university and get good results. By that token, a political science (or any social science) degree from NUS will make you look quite respectable as a job candidate for a range of roles across many different industries.
Can you follow instructions in the office?

Please read this piece which I wrote earlier this year: my degree is irrelevant and useless. Now LBS, I know you're young and eager to learn and it is great that you are so enthusiastic about your education, but allow me to offer you a bitter truth about your education. Don't overestimate what university can do for you - especially if you're going to be studying political science, 99% of it will be totally useless (and I am already being very generous with that figure of 99%). But you need to take it seriously and do well in it anyway just to prove that you're a willing learner who can follow instructions. You're never going to waltz into a job and be asked to apply what you've learnt at university - fuck that, you have to follow instructions and do things the way your boss wants them to be done. You have to keep your head down, learn quickly, adapt yourself to the company and do things their way - you cannot waltz in and proclaim, "you're doing it all wrong people, let me show you what I've learnt at university." Don't even go there...

Okay LBS,so where does this leave us? If you want to pursue your dreams of becoming a journalist in Singapore, then you need to work towards getting on the SPH undergraduate scholarship scheme - that is the golden ticket you need to make your dreams come true. Otherwise, feel free to go ahead and get a social science degree from NUS (sociology, political science etc) with the knowledge that you're extremely unlikely to get any kind of job in politics in Singapore and that this is just a general degree to set you up for the working world. And if you want to work abroad in the future, feel free to do so but please do not ever be your own worst enemy by having such a lousy, defeatist attitude about competing with anyone. Sorry if this sounds harsh LBS, but that's the kind of stupid bullshit that I've heard too many Singaporeans come up with - admitting defeat even before going to battle. You must not ever allow yourself to give in to this kind of pessimistic, defeatist bullshit before even facing a challenge. Having this super fierce, competitive attitude may have made me come across as obnoxious, proud and arrogant to many, but what is the alternative - to have a defeatist loser's attitude? Come on LBS, please lah, you know you can do better than that.
Do you have the right attitude to take on life's challenges?

As I am huge fan of K-culture, allow me to finish on a Korean note. As they say in Konglish (Korean-English), "Fighting/Hwaiting/Paiting!" That's the Korean equivalent of 加油 - yeah they took an English word but as there's no 'F' sound in Korean, it often comes out as Hwaiting (or sometimes Paiting) instead. It is something they shout to encourage someone who is facing a challenge, "HWAITING!!" And this is what I am saying to you as well LBS, I want you to be Hwaiting all the way to make your dreams come true and whether it is going for the SPH scholarship or working abroad, I want you to believe in yourself and not give in to any kind of defeatist attitude. Please let me know what you think LBS. Perhaps you were not encouraged enough as a child (LOL, tell me about it, I had Singaporean parents too) but for what it's worth, allow me to encourage you to follow your dreams in 2014. Hwaiting all the way!!


18 comments:

  1. Thank you so much for your advice! :D

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    1. Hi, you're welcome. I know it's a lot to take in, take your time to have a read of it and then come back to me and let me know your thoughts, cheers.

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    2. Thank you so much for your advice. I too many other passion, like in debate and acting. My CCA was the ELLDS (english literary debating and drama society) and I believe I need to re-think about what I want to do in the future. Writing about politics can become my hobby but I don't think it can become my career in Singapore. I agree that SPH is like a mouthpiece for the government so not much "analysis" is required for me to write about politics here.

      Is taking a business degree better for me? From what I heard from my relatives, I was told that Law and Business degree are highly valued by employers because such graduates are trained to present and speak confidently. BTW, how did you find your first job?

      Thank you! :D

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    3. Hi there LBS, a business degree is useless. Please read these posts where I have already explained just how utterly useless business degrees are:

      http://limpehft.blogspot.co.uk/2013/05/is-degree-really-that-important.html
      http://limpehft.blogspot.co.uk/2013/09/is-degree-that-important-anyway.html
      http://limpehft.blogspot.co.uk/2012/02/q-getting-job-in-finance.html

      Law is definitely highly valued - but how can they say business degrees are highly valued? Like seriously, WTF? What bullshit stupid rubbish is that?

      As for graduates trained to present and speak confidently - WTF? It is a chicken & egg situation LBS, people who are confident speakers, who can stand up in front of a court and present a case to a judge & jury are naturally attracted to law - the same way people who are flexible are attracted to gymnastics. However, gymnastics cannot make you more flexible if you're simply born with the wrong kind of body for the sport - likewise, if you're utterly frightened by the thought of public speaking, a law degree will NOT - I repeat, will NOT help you overcome that!

      There is no such training as part of any law or business training - these are what we consider 'soft skills' that you're simply expected to have anyway along with other 'soft skills' like time management, dealing with people, dealing with stress etc. Sorry as I slap my forehead in utter despair but this is so bloody Singaporean - good grief. Your Singaporean relatives expect the education system to spoon feed you every darn thing you need, when in reality, you're expected to pick up a lot of these soft skills yourself! So it's utter bullshit and completely false what they say and please don't hate them for giving you false and misleading information, good grief. They probably know nothing and are trying to help but instead, they are misleading you by giving you information that is totally FALSE.

      Please take this as a lesson LBS, next time some adult tries to give you advice, take it with a pinch of salt and then go online and verify the information or ask at least another adult you do trust to check if the information is accurate. I'm sure your relatives are not trying to mislead or deceive you but good grief, they don't know shit.

      If you are really interested in a course that trains you to speak confidently, then go for a speech & drama course at the British Council - you'll kill two birds with one stone: they're teach you how to speak English properly (or check out my vlog posts on the issue of Singaporean accents) and they will deal with the issue of public speaking. But if you're a terrible public speaker, then any law / business lecturer will look at you and shake his head and wonder, what the hell are you doing law / business if you're so terrified of public speaking? You're in the wrong course and I'm not here to train you how to present and speak confidently - you're not a 7 year old child, you're an adult: figure it out yourself damnit, I'm not here to spoonfeed you like a baby.

      Seriously, stop listening to your relatives, they don't know shit.

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    4. Sorry if I am having a rant about this - but it's like your relatives saying, "oh do a degree in mathematics, they will train you to be good with numbers." If you're terrible with numbers, it is not the job of the teachers at the maths department at the university to deal with your problems! The maths dept at the university would naturally attract people who are great with numbers, not people who are shit with numbers and expect the university to solve their problems. Good grief. It's this attitude of expecting university to spoonfeed you and solve your problems - LBS, you're expected to function like an adult at university and I hope you will rise to the challenge, whilst your relatives are treating you like a child.

      Personally, I believe that being able to present & do public speaking confidently is a gift - either you're naturally good at it or you're terrible at it. Even when you think about all those acting schools - they naturally attract people who are gifted at public speaking and have the confidence to go on stage in front of thousands. Life is about playing up to your strengths and making the most of your talents, rather than trying to make others fix your faults.

      If a person is seriously bad at public speaking, then the logical thing to do is to pick a career that does not involve any kind of public speaking at all.

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    5. For you LBS http://limpehft.blogspot.co.uk/2013/12/soft-skills-universities-and-bad-advice.html

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  2. Hi Limpeh, I feel that it may not be enough to simply get a degree and hope for a good job. As you said in your other article( the one about how useless your degree is), some professions really need to have a degree. Personally, I am aiming for a job in biotechnology or some other related field, so I have decided that I want to have a degree in biotechnology in a prestigious university like UCL.( I feel that NUS is not so prestigious anymore because its too mainstream, but good universities overseas like Cambridge, UCL still give people that 'wow' factor). In sec 4, I had many friends who simply didn't know whether to go to poly or JC, and I always tell them that they needed to start planning. Of course I understand that it is difficult to know what we want at our tender young age but its still important nonetheless. If I hadn't realised that I wanted a career in a field that absolutely requires a degree, and took a degree in Finance instead, it will be harder to get a field in biotechnology. Like you, I also figured out what I want through elimination, but I have some friends in my current course, which teaches a combination of IT and business skills, who absolutely dislike the business portion of the course, but they still say that they will take a business degree in university because their parents want them to, or they do not know what they want, or both, and I always try to tell them to figure out what they want instead of listening to their parents, who in many cases do not know what is best for their children, at least in terms of career matters. And then they will say something like "Yeah, but it will help me get a good job" and then I always do not know what to say afterwards.

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    1. Hi Ron, I can totally relate to what you say! My parents had absolutely no clue when it came to career advice and they still argue with me about issues over education despite the fact that I've been out in the big bad working world for so many years - my parents were primary school teachers so they grossly over-valued the importance of one's education because they wanted to believe that they played an important role in all their students' lives. Whereas for me I'm like, fuck education, soft skills are far more important, you need to be street smart, you need to be good with people, you need to be confident when it comes to dealing with strangers, you need to be able to read the emotions of others you work with - none of that is taught in school, all of that is picked up on the streets and of course, none of that means anything to my parents as they have spent their entire lives in the environment of the primary school, persuading their students to study hard and what I am talking about is just incomprehensible to them.

      But I do think that we should allow ourselves a few years in the working world to decide what we really do want to do - because we grow up and learn so much once we enter the working world and I think it is perfectly okay to delay that career decision until then.

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    2. PS. Check out LBS' relatives' bad advice to her and my response above. Groan groan groan double groan. It just frustrates me that relatives (with seemingly good and noble intentions) can come up with such utterly shit advice.

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    3. Yeah I have also heard many people saying that business is good, business gets you a super well paying job blah blah blah, and I honestly believed it back then. I'm glad I read your blog then, as your articles told me that a business degree is rather worthless. Although I am rather curious about how this myth became so widespread. Was a business degree really worth a lot back in the 70s or 80s because not many people had the ability to go to university back then? Then the people singing praises about business degrees may simple be giving outdated advice. I think that LBS' parents trying to discourage her from politics is because they probably saw opposition members like JBJ getting bankrupted by the PAP, so they are just concerned about her well being, as that fear has probably been drilled deep into their mindset.

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    4. Hi Ron, I feel I should do a blog piece about why people believed (and still believe) that business degrees are useful - I could do that issue justice in a blog post.

      As for voicing one's opinion about politics in Singapore, you won't get into trouble merely for voicing an opinion, even if it is anti-PAP. You could get into trouble if you actively participate in politics, JBJ was extremely active in politics - he is not just someone who happens to have piped up and voiced an opinion. After all, the PAP only won 60.14% of the popular vote in the last election, they know that about 40% of the population do not support the PAP - what are they going to do, jail everyone who is amongst that 40%? They can't do that, they won't do that nor do they have any desire to do that - so LBS's parents are being paranoid, really.

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    5. As promised Ron: http://limpehft.blogspot.co.uk/2013/12/the-myth-about-business-degrees.html

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  3. Btw I have read about your parents and how politics is a taboo subject in your home. I have the same parents as well they really hate the fact that I am interested in politics. I had once ask them if I can go to Hong Lim park to protest but they gave me a serious look and say, "no no no you cannot oppose the government! They will black mark you for life! You will not get any job in the civil service! No scholarship for you! Don't because the mata will take pictures of your face and you are doom for life!"

    How did you handle your parents? Even my sister told that I will be responsible if my parents got a heart attack and die if I get arrested. How do you cope with that lack of freedom to express and share your opinion on local politics? I really feel upset over it because whenever I attempt to talk to my friends about news event it is always either they don't know about it, (etc Syria Civil war) or they "cannot" talk about it. What do you think about this fear of talking about politics almost every Singaporeans is carrying?

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    1. Well LBS, I can totally relate to what you say - I did go to the last Hong Lim Park event and it was a total let down (see my youtube rant). Let me summarize my response like this. I gather you're about 18 years old and I had this Eureka moment at about the age of 17. I sat in silence and overheard the conversation between my mother and her colleague whilst waiting for my father one day - and the same way I gave you a rant about your relatives not knowing what the hell they're talking about, well, my mother and her colleague were both as salah as one could be on the issue. I knew they were both wrong, it was the blind leading the blind, they were both ignorant and wrong and I thought, do I speak up and correct them both or do I pretend not to have heard anything?

      I chose the latter and as I did so, I realized one thing: I am far more intelligent, educated and smarter than my mother ever will be. And that was 20 years ago at the age of 17. I'm now 37 and have spent the last 20 years going to university on scholarship then working in many countries around the world - I've become smarter and smarter, more and more educated and worldly wise with each passing year whilst my mother instead has gone the opposite direction. She has retired and has a very limited routine (which includes mostly caring for her disabled grandson) so she is not even interested in reading the newspaper or watching the news on TV, she is not internet literate and sorry, but she has become more and more ignorant and her mind seems to be stuck in the 1990s and has not progressed since. But to be fair, she is a very old lady now.

      You know what my response is to all that? I am forgiving. I am grateful for the fact that I have become so educated and have had the chance to have done so much in my life (and LBS, you too will do so much with yours in the next 20 years!) and my mother simply has not had those opportunities in her life. I have lowered my expectations of her intellectually, so if she says something ignorant and stupid (which she does like ALL the time I swear), I simply let it go because my expectations of her are that low when it comes to engaging me intellectually. I change the topic and talk about something which she can understand, like cooking traditional Chinese dishes.

      And if I want to talk about politics and other topics she will not be able to understand, I have plenty of highly educated friends to turn to.

      I encourage you to read this piece please: http://limpehft.blogspot.co.uk/2013/02/was-singapore-fishing-village-in-1965.html This will give you an idea of just how crap education was back in your parents' days and perhaps you are taking it for granted just how much more educated and intelligent you are and it seems your expectations of your parents are too high in that context.

      Let it go LBS, it is not worth it. Lower your expectations of your parents. You are simply setting yourself up for a lot of angst and frustration by having such incredibly high expectations of your parents. I learnt to do that back when I was 17, listening to my mother talk to her colleague. It's time you do that too. The ball is in your court my friend. If you wanna talk about politics, I am here for you.

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    2. Yes I should appreciate what kind of education I have now and the better opportunities than them. They seem to have a very traditional view on life and my mine is totally different from them. I have totally different dreams and aspirations. Thanks for your advice, I guess I should be more understanding of my parents. :)

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    3. There you go - your parents will never admit it, but there will come the day (or has it arrived already) when you will become more educated than your parents but because they're Asian they will never admit it (even if it something for them to be proud of). Besides, as you get older, you will make good friends along the way, peers who are of the same age and understand things from your point of view without that dreaded generation gap getting in the way. I think you've merely underestimated just how huge this generation gap is LBS. Simply acknowledge that generation gap is there and recognize just how big it is - that will make life a lot easier for both you and your parents.

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  4. Hi limpeh, I really enjoy reading your blog posts as I find them rather informative and I fully agree with some of your views(like how a business degree is garbage). I'm rather interested in a career that involves helping others/solving problems/analyzing stuff, so I thought of majoring in social work in NUS, as it seems to be a rather specialized degree(only a degree holder in social work can become a social worker), but many of my friends question my choice as this career does not really pay that well and the career progression might be slow. I actually have relatively decent A levels results that allows me to enter just about any other courses in a local uni. I was pretty good at chemistry and mathematics the most during school, but I'm not really interested in studying those subjects beyond the A levels syllabus. I feel that uni education is like an investment and I don't want to waste my time and money on a degree that will not help me in any way in the future. Can I request for some advice with regards to choosing a degree and career options?

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    1. Hi Dailou, I hate to be unhelpful, but I don't think I am in a position to provide any kind of useful advice because you really should be studying something that will ultimately be useful to what you wanna do. So many people (including myself) have made mistakes by studying the wrong degree and we end up realizing what we really wanna do with our working lives years later (via a process of elimination) and then in hindsight, we realize, "ah we should have studied something else instead". You need to think about what career you really wanna do and what degree would get you there - and that is something only YOU have the answers to: not your parents, not your friends, not your teachers and not me. No one else knows you better than yourself. What you need to do is to identify the career path you wanna embark on and then work backwards from there. So by that token, without knowing what you wanna do, it is pointless for me to make any kind of suggestions to you at this stage. You need to listen to YOURSELF and not others, please.

      But yeah, I do agree with your friends' opinion on social work - I wouldn't recommend it as it is too specialized. I have known others who have crossed over into it whilst having a different degree (there is training you can get). Keep your options open.

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