Laurentia Tan & Feng Tianwei - what's the difference?

Whilst I am thrilled at how well Laurentia Tan has performed at the Paralympics in London winning a bronze and a silver (WOW!), I was aghast at a rather tasteless montage piece that has been circulating on social media. Before I tell you why I find it so distasteful, let's have a look at what I am talking about:

If there was ever a dislike option on Facebook. 

Now the part I find especially distasteful is the line "abandoned motherland to represent Singapore". Firstly, any athlete winning a medal at the Olympics or Paralympics is a great achievement regardless of their nationality. I think it is distasteful to use this occasion to voice your grievances about PRCs. Secondly, why should Feng Tianwei be berated for abandoning China? Like is China missing her? Does China feel betrayed by her emigration to Singapore? Or does China really not give a shit - if asked about Feng Tianwei, chances are, most PRCs would reply, "Feng who?" (Or more like "冯谁?")

I would like to tell you about the story of Shaho Qadir - he is a British para-athlete who has since retired from competitive sports but he is an inspiration. Qadir was born in Northern Iraq and is a Kurd - he lost both his legs when Saddam Hussein's forces attacked his village in 1988 in Kurdistan (Northern Iraq). Saddam's genocide of the Iraqi Kurds is well documented and the rest of the world stood by and did nothing as they wanted to buy Iraqi oil.

Qadir came to the UK as a refugee and was eventually granted British citizenship a few years ago (NB. those who are given refugee status are not automatically awarded citizenship - that process takes a few years.) As a para-athlete, he competed in marathons (both with prosthetic limbs and in a wheel chair) and participated in other sports as well, notably gymnastics. Unfortunately, gymnastics is not a sport at the Paralympics - which is a shame as Qadir is one of the best disabled gymnasts in the world. For a while, he trained at my gymnastics club and that was how I got to know this amazing guy.

Now I have chosen to start with quite an extreme example to make a point. Obviously, Qadir's story would immediately tug at your heart strings - he is a man who lost his legs and yet has come back fighting to prove to the world that he has not given up on himself. Now would Singaporeans accuse Qadir of abandoning his homeland, betraying Saddam Hussein by running away to the West as a refugee after having his legs blown off? You'll have to be a pretty heartless bastard to expect someone like Qadir to remain in Iraq and remain loyal to Saddam Hussein under such circumstances.

Now let's go back to Feng Tianwei - she had a difficult childhood in China. Her parents were poor and had to work very hard to pay for her table tennis training. Her father suffered from multiple sclerosis and died in 2002 when Feng was just 16. Now the details are scant here - but the disabled in China are not given the kind of support that one enjoys in the West. Many are left to fend for themselves or depend on their families for everything. If Feng didn't make the national A squad, then she would be just another player struggling on the provincial circuit - competing against other table tennis players from other provinces in domestic matches. I have already talked about how tough the Chinese sports system is in my previous post on her. I do feel sorry for Feng and yes, I think that she made the right decision by moving to Singapore

If the Chinese state had given Feng generous scholarships and supported her in her quest for sporting glory, then fair enough - but the fact is, she didn't receive much support. It was her parents who supported her, not the state. Her parents worked hard to pay for her table tennis training despite her father being disabled and terminally ill. I don't believe that she owes any loyalty what so ever to the Chinese state given the way they neither supported her nor her family. Not one bit. Now in contrast, the Singapore state has been extremely generous and supportive of Feng Tianwei. Where should her loyalties lie?

I am extremely pragmatic when it comes to this: in the words of Madonna from her song 'Material Girl', "Cause the boy with the cold hard cash is always Mister Right". Any notions of loyalty or patriotism ain't gonna pay the bills - you've simply got to be practical and go with the money.

I don't believe that patriotism should be assumed - it is wrong to assume that every individual should pledge undying loyalty to the country of his/her birth. I believe that loyalty - like respect - should be earned rather than given unconditionally. Now if China wanted Feng to stay in China, they should have treated her better. I don't believe in the concept of unconditional loyalty or patriotism. Let me now tell you another story to illustrate my point.

The murder of 17 year old Shafilea Ahmed made the headlines in the UK when her own parents were found guilty of her murder. Shocking as it may seem, this is the practice of honour killing - where Asian parents would rather kill their own children than to let their behaviour bring shame to the family. The gruesome nature of this cold blooded murder shocked the nation. There were four other children in the Ahmed family but only one of them Alesha Ahmed was willing to testify against her parents. This begs the question about the other three: if you knew that your parents murdered your sister in cold blood, would you risk being accused of being unfilial and go to the police? Is your filial piety to your parents simply unconditional - even if they start murdering your siblings in cold blood and you know you could be the next one to be murdered by them?

Yes it is an extreme case, but my point is simple: our loyalties to anyone - family, community, friends, country - shouldn't be unconditional. Loyalty means so much more when it is earned compared to when it is offered unconditionally, unthinkingly. How does this apply to Singapore? 

Here's the irony. Singaporeans are not a happy, contented bunch of people - in fact, they have had a rather antagonistic relationship with their government. Where do I begin? The massive influx of PRCs who don't speak English? Spending money on PRC scholars like Sun Xu instead of helping local students? The public transport system? The ministers' pay? The lack of freedom of speech? The way the local media is censored and controlled? The unfair competition in the job market from FTs? The increasing costs of public housing? Yet for those who have decided to swallow the bitter pill and continue living in Singapore, they are extremely resentful of those who have not done exactly what they did and are not suffering as much as they are currently.

So let me get the facts right here. Singaporeans are all too ready to berate anyone who leaves their homeland as a persons who abandons his/her motherland - but on the other hand, they are not ready to offer unconditional love for the PAP and are complaining about the current conditions in Singapore. Am I the only one who sees the contradiction here? I don't believe an individual should stay in his/her country of birth if s/he is unhappy with the situation there - the only two countries in the world who still prevent their citizens from leaving are Cuba and North Korea. Otherwise, you're free to do what Feng Tianwei did - seek greener pastures abroad. Changi airport's that way, no one is stopping you.

The only way to make sure people never abandon their motherland is to demand unconditional loyalty to their country of birth. Is that a reasonable demand of all citizens of all the countries in the world, regardless of their circumstances (such as in Shaho Qadir's case)? Some countries take very good care of their citizens, whilst others don't. In the case of Feng Tianwei, let's be fair to her - the Chinese government didn't care about her, so why should she care about them? Why should she be obliged to offer unconditional patriotism?

I know there will be some of you who will argue that it is necessary to separate the government from the country - but in the case of Singapore and China, every detail of your life in the country is pretty much controlled by the government, especially in the case of professional athletes. Thus Feng's experiences in China were pretty much determined by how much support she received as a professional table tennis player. Patriotism isn't going to pay the bills and put food on the table - that's why she had to leave China.

I don't see the point in staying in an unhappy marriage - I see that as no different from being stuck in a country where you're either desperately unhappy or not getting the help you need. In the case of Laurentia Tan, she developed cerebral palsy and profound deafness after birth. Her family decided to settle in the United Kingdom as they felt she would be better able to reach her full potential with the medical facilities and specialist educational support available there. As the uncle of an autistic nephew, I can understand why her parents made that decision because the amount of help and support offered to people with disabilities in Singapore is woefully inadequate compared to the West.

Did Laurentia Tan's parents have an undying loyalty to Singapore? Were they determined to bring up their disabled daughter in Singapore? They did what was best for their daughter. They moved to England - now some Singaporeans would see the Tans' move as having "abandoned" their motherland, as an act of betrayal. If the same opportunities existed for Laurentia in Singapore to reach her full potential - she probably wouldn't have left, but how many disabled people will go on to win Singapore medals at the Paralympics? How many of them face a bleak future in Singapore with very little help from the government?

The reality is that most Singaporeans are not staying in Singapore because they have this great, passionate patriotism for motherland Singapore. Hell no. They're staying because they have no where else to go. So for them, it's like, oh well, since I am stuck here I may as well pretend I have chosen to stay here out of patriotism. It's pretty easy to shop around for another country to emigrate to when you're a super star athlete like Feng Tianwei (she did contemplate moving to Japan for a while before settling on Singapore) - but your average blue-collar worker would struggle to get a work permit for most first world countries.

Many countries have a points-based immigration system: that means each potential migrant is evaluated on a range of criteria like education, relevant language skills, professional skills, work experience, age, earning potential and personal wealth. Only those who scored enough points on this system are welcomed as new migrants. I was in a position to leave and I left. When one emigrates, we have to consider the 'push' and 'pull' factors. The pull factors for me was the desire to travel and see the world outside Singapore. The biggest 'push' factor was that I felt like a second class citizen in the country of my birth - I have served national service as a male Singapore. Yup, all 2 years 4 months of it from January 1995 to May 1997. There is no 'reward' for this sacrifice that I have made on my part as a male Singaporean - hell no. I was paid peanuts as a conscript and whilst the government is busy giving out scholarships to people like Sun Xu (who thinks that all Singaporeans are dogs). In the labour market, I am competing against foreigners with neither reservist obligations nor CPF liabilities. I'd rather be a first class citizen in the west than a second class citizen in Singapore, the country where I was born and had to serve NS.

The government has gotten away with this for so long because of two factors. Firstly, maybe there really are some Singaporeans out there who do profess unconditional loyalty and patriotism for their motherland and would gladly make these sacrifices without asking for anything in return. Secondly, they are counting on the fact that most Singaporean men wouldn't get through the rigorous points-based immigration system of these other countries, so they may lose a somewhat small portion of the male Singaporean cohort who were so pissed off that they moved abroad - but for the rest of them, the government knows they're stuck in Singapore. They have no where to go, even if they wanted to leave Singapore - Guess what? Other countries wouldn't want them. And guess what? It works - the men in white are still in power, aren't they?

Lastly, I would like to talk about the misuse of the word 'abandon' by you Singaporeans. Let me tell you a story from my secondary school days. We had a terrible English teacher for a few months. We all hated her and wish we could have a better teacher. Our wish came true, mid way through the year she announced that her fiancé was going to move abroad for work - so they have decided to get married immediately and then she would go with her husband. When she told us the story, she said, "I am so sorry to have to abandon you boys in the middle of the year like that, I know you will all miss me when I am gone." Oh boy. I nearly burst out laughing, I was thinking, "no please, do go.  Kindly abandon us to a better teacher, we won't miss you."

When I took out my trash earlier today, I didn't abandon my trash to the rubbish chute. No, I merely threw my thrash down the rubbish chute. To use the word abandon implies a sense of betrayal with consequences - for example, "to abandon a city to an advancing enemy army". Or "the captain had to abandon his ship when it was clear how fast it was sinking". Or even "the destitute mother abandoned her baby on the doorsteps of the orphanage."  Heck, aren't all Chinese-Singaporeans descended from migrants who also "abandoned motherland China?" Duh. Okay, so Feng left China - but is "abandon" the word to use? Like, did the women's table tennis programme of China collapse after Feng's departure? No, they were in pretty good shape, they didn't need her and they didn't miss her. In fact, the Chinese team defeated Singapore at the 2008 Olympics and again at the 2012 Olympics. Feng performed well enough to medal at both Olympics, but still not well enough to beat China. Don't forget, Feng left China after a long period of illness and nobody could have been sure at that stage if she was going ever to be able to return to competitive table tennis after period - thus the Chinese coaches wouldn't have bat an eyelid at her departure.

We didn't miss our teacher who left halfway through the year - she may have thought that she abandoned us, but the teacher who took her place was a much better teacher, so she actually did our class a big favour by "abandoning" us thus. Feng didn't "abandon" China - she merely moved away and China (or more specifically, the Chinese women's table tennis programme) didn't miss her. Heck, they probably wished her luck, hoped that things worked out for her in Singapore and it was probably quite amicable. It irks me that Singaporeans keep trying to insinuate that there was a betrayal in Feng's "abandonment" when there probably was none. This is nothing short of a smear campaign to make Feng look like a traitor and it has to stop. Now.

Why are Singaporeans so keen to assume the worst of Feng Tianwei when Laurentia Tan has spent virtually all her life in England? Do the maths. Laurentia Tan may have been born in Singapore, but she moved to England at the age of 3. She is now 33 - that means she has spent 90.9% of her life in England and only  9.1% of her life in Singapore. Feng is currently 26 and moved to Singapore 5 years ago (but was in Japan before that), that means she has spent 19.2% of her life in Singapore, 7.7% of her life in Japan and 73.1% of her life in China. In terms of the amount of time spent in Singapore and how that is reflected as a percentage of her life, Feng has spent more time and more of her life in Singapore than Laurentia.

If you want to talk about Feng abandoning her motherland China for a better life in Singapore, well, the same accusation can be levelled at Laurentia Tan, n'est-ce pas? They do share one thing in common - they both moved to another country for a better future. The only difference was the country where they were born, so think about this one carefully before you make any more comparisons between the two of them.

I just want to end by clarifying that I think both Laurentia Tan and Feng Tianwei are wonderful athletes who have done Singapore proud with their amazing performances at the London 2012 Games. I have nothing but the greatest admiration and respect for the both of them. It was the concept of unconditional patriotism/loyalty that I was attacking, not any of these fine athletes. If anything, I am attacking the Singaporean idiot who circulated that montage which prompted this article in the first place. This concept of "abandoning one's motherland" is complete utter bullshit - like come on, our ancestors moved to Singapore from China, Malaysia, Indonesia, India and other parts of the world, "abandoning their motherland" in the process to come to Singapore for crying out aloud. You wanna insult your ancestors? Whilst I am not exactly a fan of Feng Tianwei, I do feel that she has been treated very unkindly and unfairly by Singaporean netizens. Tolong lah, sudah cukup lah! Give her a break, will ya?