unnamedApr 5, 2012 07:19 AM
Limpeh,so do you think our ranks and vocation played any part in how your perceived your 2.5 years in NS?
I don't have the statistics to back me up, but I am wondering if those people who complain about NS and how it wasted their 2.5 years of their lives were most likely specs and enlisted personnel (especially the "men") who are often perceived as lazy and slack and looking out for every opportunity to “siam” every single arrow, otherwise too lacking in leadership qualities or fitness to go into Officer Cadet School.
"Chao keng during BMT lah! See, cannot go OCS and become Occifer!"
Please not that I don't have anything against these two groups above- I was also an enlisted personnel in a combat unit and I also trained side by side with the "Hokkien Peng".
I mean officers are of a different class. They had their ranks, privileges and various opportunities to exercise their leadership skills and I guess in general were appreciated more than the other two classes of soldiers. I would guess that they had some emotional maturity during that time that motivated them to make full use of the 2.5 years of their national service, and that allowed them to better rationalize their experience.
What do you think?
I don't have the statistics to back me up, but I am wondering if those people who complain about NS and how it wasted their 2.5 years of their lives were most likely specs and enlisted personnel (especially the "men") who are often perceived as lazy and slack and looking out for every opportunity to “siam” every single arrow, otherwise too lacking in leadership qualities or fitness to go into Officer Cadet School.
"Chao keng during BMT lah! See, cannot go OCS and become Occifer!"
Please not that I don't have anything against these two groups above- I was also an enlisted personnel in a combat unit and I also trained side by side with the "Hokkien Peng".
I mean officers are of a different class. They had their ranks, privileges and various opportunities to exercise their leadership skills and I guess in general were appreciated more than the other two classes of soldiers. I would guess that they had some emotional maturity during that time that motivated them to make full use of the 2.5 years of their national service, and that allowed them to better rationalize their experience.
What do you think?
Firstly thanks for the question. To begin with, I know this is me being terribly pedantic, but I served for 2 years 4 months rather than 2 years 6 months under the old system, but there you go. Now we've gotten that out of the way, yes let's deal with your points which I feel are painfully naive, misguided and based a lot of assumptions, but hey, let me explain why I disagree with you.
- taking 2 years (and up to 2.5 years under the old system) out of our lives at our prime, just when we are about to either go to further education or start working
- being paid peanuts when effectively doing a full time job - NSF pay is often much less than foreign workers who do manual work
- the 10 year ICT cycle which is a pain for those who have demanding jobs and need to be at work rather than be forced to disrupt their working lives (ie. max 40 days a year), as well as being activated for mobilization exercises
- the mistreatment of personnel in the system (bullying etc) - even if one is not personally affected, one is often upset by witnessing such acts going on
- the unfair advantage of male foreign students (mostly from China, eg. Sun Xu) being given the chance to go to local universities without the burden of NS - creating an unfair playing field skewed against the locals as these foreigners get to bypass NS and join the workforce 2 years sooner than locals.
Now I could go on, but these are the main concerns of male Singaporeans and these factors affect ALL male Singaporeans regardless of the vocation they had in NS or what rank they attained. The bottom line is this: it's a bad deal. Whether you become an officer or not, it's a really bad deal for all male Singaporeans when you consider the entire package.
- I had already received 2 scholarships (and received a third upon receiving my A level results). Academically, I was fucking brilliant, I was every Singaporean parents' wet dream when it came to straight As. My grades could give any pushy Singaporean mother multiple orgasms if you showed her my results and told her "these are your child's results".
- I was brilliant at sports and at the time of enlistment, I had already represented Singapore in various international competitions and was already a national champion at the age of 17. I was built like a world class athlete because I was one.
Oh I could go on listing other awards I had won in the field of creative arts on top of the academic and sports awards and scholarships - but you get the idea. Whilst others in my BMT unit were desperate to get into OCS, I was trying to do the exact opposite. Even at that age, I had already met the president at the Istana already. Like what the hell did I have to prove to anymore at the SAF? All I wanted to do really was to keep my head down and get through NS peacefully so I could then get on with the next chapter of my life at university in England.
I remember the students in my primary school who were oh so keen to please their teachers, the kind of children who would raise their hands and shout, "teacher teacher, I know the answer!" in class. Whereas when children turn into teenagers, they become far less eager to impress adults like teachers as they start developing their own characters and personalities which dictate what they like and what they dislike, what they feel passionate about and what they just don't give a shit about. Well, at age 18, I was a teenager who had decided that NS was not something I liked and didn't give a shit about and was something I wanted to get through with minimum effort.
Now there was this really nasty teacher in my secondary school, I shall refrain from naming him but he was a maths teacher. Let's call him Mr Maths. Few of us liked him and if you didn't get an answer right, instead of explaining where you went wrong, he would shout at you, "why are you so stupid? This is so simple, everyone else understands it, what's wrong with you?" I hated him so much and I remember just before a maths exam he said to the class, "Make sure you get everything right, make me proud of you okay? Don't let me down." And I thought, if I do well, I'm doing it for me, I'm not doing it for you. I'm going to be doing well despite the fact that I have an awful maths teacher like you. You get the idea - we don't always have to like the people who have authority over us. It does not have to lead to some kind of Arab-spring rebellion, but at the same time, we can totally lose any desire to please the people in authority - such as in the case of Mr Maths. I met many more equivalents of 'Mr Maths' in the army - people who had authority over me. I respected their authority, I certainly didn't respect them. Respect is earned, unlike authority, which is not negotiable; and if you respect anyone and everyone in authority without asking any questions, well then you're simply not using your head enough.
Now there was this really nasty teacher in my secondary school, I shall refrain from naming him but he was a maths teacher. Let's call him Mr Maths. Few of us liked him and if you didn't get an answer right, instead of explaining where you went wrong, he would shout at you, "why are you so stupid? This is so simple, everyone else understands it, what's wrong with you?" I hated him so much and I remember just before a maths exam he said to the class, "Make sure you get everything right, make me proud of you okay? Don't let me down." And I thought, if I do well, I'm doing it for me, I'm not doing it for you. I'm going to be doing well despite the fact that I have an awful maths teacher like you. You get the idea - we don't always have to like the people who have authority over us. It does not have to lead to some kind of Arab-spring rebellion, but at the same time, we can totally lose any desire to please the people in authority - such as in the case of Mr Maths. I met many more equivalents of 'Mr Maths' in the army - people who had authority over me. I respected their authority, I certainly didn't respect them. Respect is earned, unlike authority, which is not negotiable; and if you respect anyone and everyone in authority without asking any questions, well then you're simply not using your head enough.
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Limpeh had an awful maths teacher... |
What really put the nail in the coffin was the suicide of a friend during BMT. He had enlisted earlier than me as he didn't get the 2 months off the way I did for acing my IPPT before enlistment. In so many words, he was fat, really fat. He was also a brilliant student from a very good JC. Now it seems the officers and sergeants who ran his BMT unit were not of the JC-stock. I don't want to turn this into a Poly vs JC thing, but I was told there was a lot of bullying going on. (I had friends who were his BMT mates.) They went out of their way to make these overweight guys feel really bad about their weight and the exercise regime was pretty brutal. It wasn't so much the exercise regime that drove him to breaking point though, it was the bullying. This guy was fat and academically brilliant - a bad combination in the SAF. Knowing him, he didn't fit in well at all. Amongst other things, he spoke English with an 'angmor' accent, a total taboo in the SAF and he didn't conceal the fact that he came from a very rich family. Yikes. Another taboo. Like he would get dropped off in this great big huge Mercedes Benz at the gates of the Changi ferry terminal whilst the others had to walk from the bus stop.
Being fat attracts the bullies anyway, but he failed to conceal the fact that he was brilliant and rich was a recipe for disaster. The politics of envy in Singapore is incredibly toxic and it is played out in vivid technicolor in the SAF when the rich and the poor are put together and made to work as a team, with sometimes the poor being in charge of the rich. This is something that would never happen in civilian life in a capitalist economy, but in the army, it is simply your rank that counts and even rich kids start at the bottom of the food chain as recruits. So when presented with this opportunity, they knew that for a short while they could make this fat, rich boy feel really bad about himself but once he was out of the army, he would go to a great university and then end up making a lot more money. Heck, even if he didn't, his family was filthy rich to begin with anyway. The writing was on the wall, the envy and jealousy kicked in big time and manifested itself. So whilst they could, they bullied him to breaking point. My friend killed himself.
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The big white Mercedes Benz - such a status symbol. |
Being fat attracts the bullies anyway, but he failed to conceal the fact that he was brilliant and rich was a recipe for disaster. The politics of envy in Singapore is incredibly toxic and it is played out in vivid technicolor in the SAF when the rich and the poor are put together and made to work as a team, with sometimes the poor being in charge of the rich. This is something that would never happen in civilian life in a capitalist economy, but in the army, it is simply your rank that counts and even rich kids start at the bottom of the food chain as recruits. So when presented with this opportunity, they knew that for a short while they could make this fat, rich boy feel really bad about himself but once he was out of the army, he would go to a great university and then end up making a lot more money. Heck, even if he didn't, his family was filthy rich to begin with anyway. The writing was on the wall, the envy and jealousy kicked in big time and manifested itself. So whilst they could, they bullied him to breaking point. My friend killed himself.
I wrote a piece about bullying a while ago and yes I accept that some of us cope with bullying (and preventing being bullied in the first place) a lot better than others. Many of us do face some degree of bullying in the SAF - some more than others obviously and it boils down to your ability to adapt to the people around you. Like I had analyzed in the piece on bullying in school I wrote, there are three methods that one can employ:
My friend was killed by the politics of envy in Singapore - which is incredibly toxic. Oh scratch beneath the facade of today's Singaporeans and you will find a venom that is so poisonous and dangerous, it can only be uniquely Singaporean. Singapore loves straight A students who are academically brilliant and condemns kids who are not academically gifted. This culture of bullying is a result of all these other kids who never got As at the exams being told they are stupid and just not good enough by their parents and teachers for so many years. They are told that they have to study harder and get the As because when they grow up, these straight A kids will end up being the big bosses who will tell them, "no you cannot go home until you finish this project, I don't care how late you have to stay tonight." This toxic mix of resentment, fear, loathing and anger starts bubbling away from an early age and by age 18, upon enlistment, it reaches boiling point.
So when presented with this unusual opportunity when the tables are temporarily turned: they have the chance to take all their pent up anger out on a fat kid whose only crime was being an academically brilliant student - it was nothing personal. But being fat, academically brilliant and from a rich family, he embodied the kinds of privilege that the working class in Singapore would never enjoy. Well, they went too far and he killed himself. Of course they didn't want him to kill himself (for fear of getting into trouble), but when you pluck an immature teenager out of civilian life and throw him in the army like this, ill-prepared and unable to cope with this kind of culture - like what the hell did you think was gonna happen when you subject him to that level of bullying eh? It doesn't take a genius to figure that one out. There were simply not enough safeguards in place to prevent the extreme bullying from happening.
The SAF had a duty of care to his parents to at least keep their son alive - they failed. I found out about his suicide about a few weeks into my BMT. I was so angry. No one was ever punished for his death - it was just treated like "oh big fat kid can't hack it so instead of facing the hardship he killed himself, we tried our best to help him but it was not our fault, he simply wasn't prepared for NS life so you parents out there, take heed and prepare your sons for NS."
- Let the bully know that you're tough and strong and not an easy target (that will work in the school playground, but not the SAF).
- Get friendly with the bully and let the bully think that you're just like him, hence not a target. (definitely works in the SAF)
- Slip under the radar by keeping your head down and your mouth shut, so the bullies do not notice you in the first place (Yup, another golden rule for the army).
My friend was killed by the politics of envy in Singapore - which is incredibly toxic. Oh scratch beneath the facade of today's Singaporeans and you will find a venom that is so poisonous and dangerous, it can only be uniquely Singaporean. Singapore loves straight A students who are academically brilliant and condemns kids who are not academically gifted. This culture of bullying is a result of all these other kids who never got As at the exams being told they are stupid and just not good enough by their parents and teachers for so many years. They are told that they have to study harder and get the As because when they grow up, these straight A kids will end up being the big bosses who will tell them, "no you cannot go home until you finish this project, I don't care how late you have to stay tonight." This toxic mix of resentment, fear, loathing and anger starts bubbling away from an early age and by age 18, upon enlistment, it reaches boiling point.
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How many of you Singaporeans can afford to go shopping here? |
So when presented with this unusual opportunity when the tables are temporarily turned: they have the chance to take all their pent up anger out on a fat kid whose only crime was being an academically brilliant student - it was nothing personal. But being fat, academically brilliant and from a rich family, he embodied the kinds of privilege that the working class in Singapore would never enjoy. Well, they went too far and he killed himself. Of course they didn't want him to kill himself (for fear of getting into trouble), but when you pluck an immature teenager out of civilian life and throw him in the army like this, ill-prepared and unable to cope with this kind of culture - like what the hell did you think was gonna happen when you subject him to that level of bullying eh? It doesn't take a genius to figure that one out. There were simply not enough safeguards in place to prevent the extreme bullying from happening.
The SAF had a duty of care to his parents to at least keep their son alive - they failed. I found out about his suicide about a few weeks into my BMT. I was so angry. No one was ever punished for his death - it was just treated like "oh big fat kid can't hack it so instead of facing the hardship he killed himself, we tried our best to help him but it was not our fault, he simply wasn't prepared for NS life so you parents out there, take heed and prepare your sons for NS."
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In Singapore, there is a toxic gulf of envy that separates the rich and the poor. |
Think about his parents. They have brought up a son for 18 years whom they loved - he was an only child and by that token maybe they overindulged him at time. So he was a fat kid, but he was a good boy who worked so hard at school to make his parents proud. He was not a bad person, there was no malice about him - he was just 'blur' and clueless about being street smart. He lacked the social skills to deal with the politics of envy in Singapore. And please, so his parents are rich, so what? Did they rob a bank? Was the money some kind of immoral ill-gotten wealth? Hell no, his parents were both professionals who worked hard and earned that money fair and square, they were law abiding, honest people who happened to have earned a lot of money. His parents trusted the system, they send him to the army only to be bullied to death by other soldiers barely older than him (who may have been bullied themselves before) - this goes on all the time but many soldiers simply say, "it's a rite of passage, they have to learn how to cope with it" and look the other way. My friend was just the tip of the iceberg, I saw so many others get bullied along the way and it was endemic to the system. Whilst it is good to empower your children with the social skills to deal with situations like that, it is also the responsibility of those in charge to deal with bullies.
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Is bullying a rite of passage that we all have to pass through? |
Now Limpeh is not young and I've worked in various companies where the bosses have not been nice - there have been examples of bullying in the office which I have witnessed over the years. Some argue that this experience in NS is good preparation for the working world, but there is a big difference between what happens in an office and what happens in the army. For starters, many of us choose to put up with nasty bosses because the money is good. I have one boss who can be frightfully unreasonable at times, but hey, he pays well. Very well. Whenever he gets unreasonable with me, I just check my bank balance and remind myself just how much I am being paid to take this shit and I am fine.
Likewise, my friend Brenda had a terrible unpleasant boss and she didn't get along with some of her colleagues. When she reached breaking point - she resigned and found another job. She had the choice to say the words, "I quit!" when things simply got too bad. Now conscripts don't get that luxury - they are not only bound by law to serve their full term (like a prison sentence), they are not even paid adequately for their time. Heck, even prisoners get their sentenced reduced for good behaviour, conscripts don't even have that luxury. If the SAF can't give their men decent money or more flexibility in where they serve (eg. giving them the choice to choose their vocations), then at least treat them decently and prevent bullying. That is the very, very least you could do for the men.
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Brenda: "I quit!!" |
Now my regular readers will know that I had been involved in competitive sports throughout my teenage years in Singapore and the national team trained under these really strict PRC coaches - the training was China-standard tough but they were at least firm and fair. Through these PRC coaches (one of whom was a former national team member), I learnt the true meaning of discipline. What the SAF presented, their version of 'discipline' was a pathetic joke compared to what I had learnt from the (often sadistic) PRC coaches. But here was the difference: I worked my butt off under those PRC coaches because I wanted to do well in my sport, it was a selfish thing. It was all about me me me me me me. I knew I wanted to be the best and if I worked hard under the PRC coaches, I would be the best in the country. It was a major ego trip. I chose to subject myself to their PRC standard training regime, whereas in the SAF, hell no, there was no place for anyone's ego. It was no place for divas who wanted to be the best. People didn't get ego trips from being the best - no. Doing too well, doing better than anyone else would only draw attention to yourself and attract the bullies who will think, "so you think you are better than me? I'll show you..." Hell no. You don't want that. You don't want to outperform the rest, you want to be as average as possible, so as not to be noticed.
There was this other A-level guy in my camp, who studied at a top JC. Now he got himself into so much trouble by making enemies. He was arrogant - quite simply, he was put in a fairly menial vocation where he didn't get to use his brains at all. He answered to a regular sergeant who was simply not interested in his JC boy's endless suggestions to improve productivity and efficiency. The JC boy was simply trying to bloody hard to make his time worthwhile (a rather Singaporean thing) and trying to show initiative but that was the wrong thing to do. He was trying to rationalize why the hell as well educated smart boy like him would be put in such a menial vocation and assumed that he was placed there to add some brain power to this menial function. Oh no. He ended up being bullied quite badly by the regulars because nobody likes a smart Alec who was trying to show off how brilliant he was. Actually he had some pretty good ideas, but the SAF was hardly the place for him to express those ideas. He should've kept his head down, mouth shut and got on with his job.
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Shut up, nobody wants to hear your bright ideas lah. |
I remember this conversation I had with this regular in my unit, Ah Yong. Yes that's his real name and I wonder what the chances are of him reading this, probably zilch. Anyway, Ah Yong once said to me in, "OK, Lr ay hiao tzo handstand, ay hiao tung sa, 除了这两个 talent, lr ka ay hiao simi? Aiyah lr bueh tak chek ah bueh hiao kin lah, ay sai kr join 中国杂技团 or Circus de solar." ("Okay, so you can do handstands, you can take off your clothes, apart from these two talents, what else can you do? Since you are too stupid to study, never mind, you can go join the China national acrobatic troupe or Cirque du Soleil.") Ah Yong's reference of me taking off my clothes was in reference to the fact that I loved walking around without my shirt on whilst in camp as I had this magnificent 6-pack then (oh those were the days). I almost laughed at the reference to "Circus de solar" - but I was good at this. I said to him, "Lr gong wa bueh tak chek, lr masi bueh tak chek mah Ah Yong?" ("You say I am too stupid to study, but you are equally too stupid to study too Ah Yong?") And he replied, "Ya lor, abuden? You think I sign on for what?" I actually did convince many of the regulars that I was indeed genuinely "bueh tak chek". Hey, to his credit, Ah Yong did know about Cirque du Soleil ... or Circus de Solar as he called it.
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Can someone inform the SAF that Singapore has a brilliant education system? |
Think about it - Singapore actually does have a remarkably good education system and the average level of education of the entirely SAF is much, much higher than say the British army or the US army because we have conscription. Yet the SAF's system does not take advantage of that, no - instead, they pretty much just use the US and UK model and this results in the SAF having stunningly well educated infantry soldiers, storemen and clerks doing vapid, menial tasks, using their muscles but not their brains. What an incredible waste! We're in the age of internet, where wars are fought and won on the basis of technology - yet the SAF still wants to make soldiers dig trenches and "chiong sua" (Hokkien: "run up the hill", epitomizing meaningless physical exercises soldiers are typically made to do in the SAF) instead of using their brains to engage in military intelligence? The SAF are effectively using well educated individuals as unskilled labour - if that's all you want, heck why not just get some foreign workers to do it? That's what happens when you squeeze a round peg into a square hole - you simply cannot adopt another country's system wholesale especially when you have conscription and they don't.
As for your claim that officers are of a different class - excuse me, I don't know whether to laugh at the joke or mock your ignorance, so I shall smirk with sarcasm. I think about many CVs I have read over the years as I interviewed many candidates who wanted to work for my company, it's not easy to prove that you're made of the good stuff and it won't be easy to impress me. If you are willing to consider someone to be 'a different class' just because they've made it through OCS, then excuse me, your standards are shockingly low. The case of the fat JC recruit who was bullied to death was something that happened as a result of SAF officers doing a very bad job and goodness me, I have so many other stories of terrible officers I have encountered along the way in my 2 years 4 months.
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There are many chances in life to prove yourself. |
This is a very big layer cake you realize and everyone knows exactly where they are belong in the hierarchy - that is what your rank is for. Are you assuming that someone who's a 2LT can act like a king, has no pressure and life in the army is like being on holiday? Oh please. They have even more responsibilities, they are answerable to a senior officer who may or may not be a nice person and when the shit hits the ceiling fan (eg. death or serious injury of a soldier in camp), the blame always gets passed to those of lower rank. These NSF officers are stuck in the worst possible position because the buck often stops with them when things go badly wrong and they cannot pass the buck to a non-officer of lower rank and you know their bosses are never going to take the blame if they can pass the buck.
I have friends who did go on to OCS and become officers and oh boy, they all had their fair share of hardship. A friend from JC who did become an officer had a particularly shitty time as he simply did not get along with his immediate superior who went out of his way to make life hell for my friend - it was still bullying any way you looked at it! And if you think that there's any kind of 'leadership' skills to be exercised by these NSF officers when really, most of the time, they were merely acting on the strict instructions of someone of senior rank and it wasn't unusual for a soldier (such as myself) to cosy up to a senior officer who was a regular and of much higher rank so whenever I needed something done, I could easily go to the big boss rather than my immediate officer, hence subverting the chain of command.
As for "emotional maturity" - again, I don't know whether to laugh or cry at that suggestion. Oh please, surviving OCS is not a sign of "emotional maturity" - it shows a certain toughness that's for sure, but some of the fucked up officers I have encountered are anything but emotionally mature. I may use the term "emotional maturity" to describe maybe say a young child who can cope with disappointment without kicking up a big fuss and acts in a very sensible, responsible manner way beyond his/her years - but OCS? Are you kidding me? What has emotional maturity got to do with OCS? I shall let this one pass and chalk it up to a really poor choice of words. OCS tends to attract a certain breed of power hungry men who are desperate to prove themselves, often these are men who are still looking for the highlight of their adolescence and feel they have something to prove.
Even if we were to go with your wrongful assumptions that officers did have a good time in army (I'm sure some did, but not all - that's my point: it's completely dependent on whom they worked with, their unit's culture etc) and did get to exercise some leadership skills, it still doesn't mitigate the main 5 complaints that I had outlined at the very beginning of this article. Even if they did have a fucking brilliant time, guess what? They're still screwed by the system in the process (2 years of their lives, no money, endless reservist bullshit, bullying, foreign talents etc). It's like anal sex. Some gay men enjoy it and think it's fabulous whilst for others, it's just a terrible pain in the butt. It seems like by your logic, you're suggesting, "if I'm going to get fucked up the anus, I may as well enjoy the experience. I've heard from my gay friends that it's quite shiok if you can hit the male G-spot on the prostate."
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I can't post some hardcore gay porn of butt fucking, so you get this picture instead. |
And now, time for the punchline: you know what this boils down to? Well, you gave me a clue in your post: you said, "that allowed them to better rationalize their experience." Oh that's something Singaporeans do a lot, even when the PAP screws you over year after year, you keep voting for them year after year because somehow, somehow - in your twisted brains, you 'rationalize' this seemingly irrational choice. I have talked about this here: http://limpehft.blogspot.co.uk/2012/03/interview-explaining-singapore-to.html
Faced with the fact that you cannot change the system, oh you Singaporeans go into this "rationalizing" overdrive to convince yourselves that everything is okay and that the PAP loves you and all that bullshit. The other half of this "rationalizing" that you do is that so many Singaporeans tell themselves such awful, crazy lies about how awful life is in the West so no matter how shitty things get in Singapore, in their minds, it's still better than the west. When I hear some of the bullshit that Singaporeans come up with about the west, I just roll my eyes and think, "are you trying to convince me, or are you trying to convince yourself?"
Well I used to rationalize a lot of things in Singapore when I was growing up there, but I stopped doing it the day my friend died in BMT. What happens when you stop rationalizing like that? You are faced with the stark, ugly realities of life in Singapore under this system that you can't change and the only real option is to emigrate to find greener pastures.
Well I used to rationalize a lot of things in Singapore when I was growing up there, but I stopped doing it the day my friend died in BMT. What happens when you stop rationalizing like that? You are faced with the stark, ugly realities of life in Singapore under this system that you can't change and the only real option is to emigrate to find greener pastures.
I suspect that the vast majority of Singaporeans who have read this article will go right back to your "rationalizing" within five minutes, even if I did strike a chord with you temporarily. But hey, given the public anger and outcry after the fucking PRC bus driver ran that woman over in Sengkang, maybe Singaporeans will finally wake up and smell the kopi? Why don't you tell me? After all, I served NS back in the mid 90s, that was a long time ago - have things changed for the better since? What are your experiences? Leave a comment, thanks.
The debate continues here in Part 3, when Limpeh would gladly dispel some of the common myths about NS in Singapore. http://limpehft.blogspot.co.uk/2012/04/part-1-limpeh-debunks-some-ns-myths.html
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Can you smell the coffee? |
The debate continues here in Part 3, when Limpeh would gladly dispel some of the common myths about NS in Singapore. http://limpehft.blogspot.co.uk/2012/04/part-1-limpeh-debunks-some-ns-myths.html
fucking A, limpehft.
ReplyDeleteHi - just edited it and updated it today, adding more details about my friend who killed himself.
DeleteMy rationalizing stopped due to NS too.. No my friend did not die, but I was a medic in Tekong who saw young men suffer from heat stroke from training. Some probably died and many suffered permanent brain damage.
ReplyDeleteWhen I ORD and studied in NTU, I realized the government offered generous scholarships to Chinese PRC and the prob is my results are as good and if not better than their. Worse, I gave 2 years of my life for my country and I was not given even the opportunity. During that stage in my life, my family had financial difficulties and I had to give tuition and take up part time jobs during vacation while these "talents" enjoyed free education.
So here I am, a son of the land, who put his 2years 4 month of his life for the country, who is as academically gifted as a PRC chap but had to give tuition while they party with the taxpayers money I helped defend. Actually, if SAF had paid me regular salary for that 2 years, my financial difficulties would have eased. No .. I was paid $240 as a recruit and I have to take $ from parents during my time in NS. They dun even fking pay enough so I can sustain myself during NS.
From that point on, I stop rationalizing.
Roy
Hi Roy. Thanks for your comment. I think what you said originally reminded me of what my sister said to me when I was in NS. She was pushing me to become an officer because in her opinion, that was the best way to prevent oneself from being bullied. That was not necessarily the case - like I mentioned in my post, I had a JC friend who became an officer and he kena tekan like crazy by his regular officer because they just didn't see eye to eye. The regular officer had chosen the SAF as a career whilst my friend, well, he was just passing through and as soon as he ORDed, he was off to university and then going to work in the private sector. The regular officer was like, "what makes you think you can swan around like me, just because you've made it through OCS? I will show you who is boss around here you maggot. You will never be a proper officer." Apparently there was a big gulf between 'regular' officers and NSF officers and in this case, my friend was very unfortunate and his case clearly proved my sister wrong.
DeleteSo guess what? My friend actually had a pretty shitty time despite having the rank of an officer, whilst in keeping my head down and mouth shut and being very careful with people, the last 1 year 4 months were a breeze (the first 12 months were very difficult though). I think I was very lucky to get a change of unit mid-way through my service at just before the 1 year mark. Ironically, it was literally just 5 minutes walk down the road, even within the same army camp! But at that point I was able to say, OK I have learnt so much in my first year, I am given the opportunity for a fresh start in this new unit, no one knows me there, I am going to apply everything I have learnt about people in the SAF.
It ain't rocket science really. Keep your head down, mouth shut, opinions to yourself, don't talk to much, don't draw attention to yourself, don't offend people, be polite and respectful to all even if you dislike them and learn the difference between respecting someone's authority and respecting them as an individual.
This brings me to a point. No disrespect to your sister, but I am extremely irritated when Singaporean women comes and start telling the men how NS is good for them and how they should approach NS to make the best out of it.
DeleteThey do not have to go through NS, and they know nothing about the experience or SAF. Yet somehow, just because they heard some promotional SAF material and some Straits Times articles, they think they understand NS.
Roy
Men dun tell women how to cope with pregnancy and how labor pains builds character because we have not gone through that and it is very poor taste to start lecturing others on something you have not and will never have to go through exp when you have nothing to rely on except for hearsay and articles. Sure if they are PHD psychological grads from MIT who did a paper on Military psychology, I would defer to their expertise, but no. They must have a word on NS. Terrible manners. I think this is basic courtesy that Singaporean Princesses lack.
The Taiwanese ladies and the Korean ladies, now you never hear anything but appreciation from them about how their men have to serve and sacrifice.
Oh this is oh so true - can I just add that what my sister learnt about NS came from her former JC classmates whom she kept in touch with. I did think that they were going to tell her only the highlights rather than pour their hearts out to her about how they kena tekan by some nasty officer etc. So yeah, her impressions of the NS experience was all filtered through this "I don't want to lose face" filter at gatherings of former JC classmates when the guys were all trying to show the girls at NUS just how macho and tough they are in the army.
DeleteIt is quite a different story when us men who have gone through the whole thing are able to sit down and share stories heart to heart with no filter, no censors and just speak honestly of our experiences. It's like my JC friend, the officer who kena taken like siao by a senior regular officer who just had something against him and was determined to 'show him who is boss' in the unit - he suffered so much bullying it was unreal, his example does dispel my sister's theory that officers are above the bullying.
Limpeh, ur recent posts really speak to me as a newly enlisted recruit just 1 month into bmt. Still I wonder ur method of surviving through ns could work for me cause u at least had something to look forward to. For a guy like me with little plans for the future, I wonder if trying to ' rationalise' my experience and have a ' positive' attitude is the only way I will be able to cope. I haven't even gone through most of the shit experiences in bmt yet. How did u manage to cope through the worst times in bmt?
ReplyDeleteHello Yen and thanks for your post. How are you doing man? I can remember how tough BMT was for me on Tekong, I guess I've said enough in the article above about how the suicide of a friend affected me.
DeleteOf course you have plenty to look forward to - you should realize however that as an adult, you cannot expect others to plan your future for you, only you can do so for yourself. Heck, letting others plan your future is a bad idea as they cannot possibly know what makes you tick, what makes you passionate and what makes you truly happy. This is a wake up call for you my friend, for you to think about what plans you wanna make for the future - what make you happy? What do you wanna do with your life? What must you do to get there? Time to start making those plans mate.
And as for rationalizing your experience ... I say man, keep it real. You don't have to pretend you like the people around you, you don't have to like what you do, you don't have to pretend that it is useful or that you'll learn anything - you do have to get along with the people around you and you do have to perform whatever comes your way to the best of your ability, do you understand the difference?
I think most people break down mentally when they try to convince themselves that they do like what they're having to do when they clearly don't and this conflict drives them over the edge. Be honest with yourself, listen to yourself and if it helps, write down how you feel on a piece of paper rather than have thoughts bouncing around your head in a random manner. Your feelings are valid and you need to acknowledge them, even if no one else does. (And I'm always here to listen - I will always listen my friend.)
As for getting through the worst times in BMT, I went into shut down auto-pilot mode. If you're just 1 month into BMT, maybe you're not familiar with this concept yet. You simply become like a robot you know - with no feelings. Nobody can hurt you, nobody can anger you and you feel nothing. Gosh, I knew there was this 3SG who hated not just me, but every single one of us who were from the JC-batch. He would ask us what JC we're from and I was too stupid to lie then. I found out only much later that he had failed his A-levels and was trying to retake them whilst in NS but had failed again on his first attempts and he was trying so hard to get into NUS/NTU as his family couldn't afford to send him abroad. So he took out his frustration and anger on us JC kids who could get straight As at the first attempt at the A levels - it was really the first time in my life I felt something as ugly and scary as that. For someone to hate you for a reason like that despite having only just met and he went out of his way to bully every single one of us who were from good JCs.
Most of all, I lowered my expectations about what the army experience could do for me. I think if you go in there with high expectations, you're bound to be disappointed - but if you are realistic about the kind of bullshit you will encounter, then it can be a learning experience, ie. "how to cope with difficult situations in life with nasty, idiotic, awful, irrational, unreasonable people". Well, that was what I took away from my NS experience and it was a lesson that served me well in the working world because believe you me, it's not just the SAF where you will encounter people like that. The world is full of them - it's just that as a student, you were fairly well protected and sheltered from the more nasty elements of society thus far.
Good luck and if you have anything else you wanna talk about, uncle Limpeh is here for you okay?
PS. Come on readers, let's show Yen some support, can I count on my more regular readers to write something for Yen please? Counting on you guys, kum siah kum siah, terima kasih.
DeleteYen,
Delete1st Suggestion:
Sit down and ask yourself if you have a medical condition that you can use to get yourself downgraded. Even if you can't get downgraded now do it before you ORD. Plan and persevere downgrading is possible and easy and very valuable if you are not as gifted as LIFT or have the chance to work overseas, planning ahead and getting yourself a C2 PES status will exempt your from the IPPTs tests that comes with the very very painful RTs
I got downgraded just before my ORD. My friends laughed and said I wasted my efforts and they did not mind IPPT as it helps and force them to keep fit and will enjoy the free money from scoring IPPT gold/silver every year(they were gym buffs). Now they sport beer bellies and curse at RTs. While I clock <12min during the 2.4km phase of my weekly 10km jogs and can manage > 50 situps and >12 pull ups at 33years old.
My point? You dun need a compulsory test if you wanna be fit? Get a downgrade and enjoy your freedom to choose.
LIFT can do freaking backflips becos he takes pride in himself and wants to be fit and look fit. You get a beer belly if you want to if that makes you happy.
2nd Way:
This is how I did it. Everytime it gets really bad, tell myself 2 years passes quickly, and help yourself my trying to tell yourself how fast 4 years in Sec School passed and how right now in BMT, you could barely recall the shitty examination period.
Thats the 2 ways I think will help.. I can elaborate on how important 1) is if you need.
Roy
Hi.. may I reflect on Roy's points anyway. If you do have a genuine medical condition that warrants a downgrade then get it addressed - otherwise, it is very hard to pretend to be sick when you're not. So please, keep it realistic with regards to this downgrade business. Don't 'keng' - you can't fool the system.
DeleteI think everyone should keep fit because they need to do so for health reasons, rather than because there is any kind of financial incentive to do so offered by the SAF during IPPT time.
Thanks Roy.
personally, it is with regret when i think how i have squandered time while i was in ns.
Deletenow i wish i had done part time studies or any other actions i really should have thought of and executed... anything i could have done to prepare myself for working life.
considering that one will be in working life upon the end of ns, all the way till u are dead (ok i exaggerate, but at least till u are 65).
were i to turn back time, i would learn more languages (limpehft is such an inspiration here), learn of other countries where i might want to try to work in, do whatever research to prepare myself as an internationally viable "economic unit".
u are young only once. age will rob u of energy n desire, if u do not train in the art of personal discipline now. do not let it pass u by.
i haven't said anything about ns, but i feel it is insignificant in the grand scheme of things, what matters is the time (and youthful energy) that u spend on.
for what it's worth, i was just an average guy in my platoon. i kept my head down, got along with others as well as i was able (mix of ah bengs, air levels n few uni grads).
Thanks for the comment mate. V kind of you :)
DeleteHi Limpeh, what you've said here has really struck a chord with me. I have tried to rationalize NS from the POV of many people, and while i agree that there are some benefits to it, I think that the cons outweigh any rewards that might be gained. From the time I heard about this need to fulfill my NS "duties" as a young boy, I've thought about evading it. I've never been the masculine guy, and I've never clicked well with the typical bro-dudes who can click with each other by talking about sports or girls. Unfortunately, I didn't have the luxury of migrating before I had to enlist, but even now, I'm in a local uni and can only realistically move overseas to work (and start the migration process) in 4 years' time.
ReplyDeleteI guess what I want to say is that what you've written here (and in other posts regarding NS) is so true; i wish my family and some of my friends could understand it for themselves. I gave up two years of my youth to do mundane things, and be treated like I don't have a brain when I'm damned sure that my brain deserves better. I hate talking about NS, and just shut down when someone talks about it, and get turned off when guys try to "click" with me using NS as a shared experience.
The success you appear to have achieved in life so far makes me even more sure that I don't need to stay here forever. Thank you for writing so well, for sharing your opinions and for articulating them so eloquently. Keep up the good work. :) You sound like someone I could really hang out with IRL. Haha!
Thanks so much for your kind message - it's readers like you who justify the effort I take to write this blog. I am touched by your heartfelt message :) If there are any other topics you would like me to cover, please let me know.
DeleteHi, thank you for writing this. I do not have any huge grievances considering the people I met are quite fine people, though there are still some douches. Yes I got along well with people, but I never really missed them besides a couple of them.
ReplyDeleteI always thought I was in the minority (though not a 1.5% minority as ST claims) that opposes NS. I do not have real sound arguments for it (not that smart) but I think instinctively people made up their minds on whether things are good or bad, and my instinct, despite all the group think, double think, and rationalization, tells me that something is wrong with the idea and execution in NS. Conscription is not just another obligation to society, like taxes are. Conscription is about unquestioning obedience to a government, to the point of being dictated time, effort and movement and actions involuntarily and I'm against anything that takes away a man's individual ideas and thoughts and aspirations, particularly since conscripts are of adult age.
I think in Singapore people are just way too conservative, that change is always being seen as bad, and for the idealistic and naïve. People are just resigned, and sometimes, the more you think about the cons of conscription, the more emotionally affected one is. So I guess people just rationalize it, convince themselves it is good (so that it seems that their efforts will yield some rewards, covering the truth that it normally doesn't). And of course, because they cannot challenge the perpetrator (government), they can only find fault on the victims (current conscripts), as seen by the comments of "If I can do it, of course you can do it" "Don't be a pussy", even though they disagree with conscription itself. If they truly believe in conscription, there will not be so much victim blaming, but more support for current conscripts.
Hi LIFT, im just wondering im 5 weeks in(week 4 minus week 0)
ReplyDeleteim still missing my parents badly and wishing that everyday was bookout day. How do you get over that feeling? And make time fly faster to feel like friday comes quickly. I used to take my parents care and concern for granted before i went in. Now every night after training i try not to cry when i call my parents and always wishing friday was coming nearer. Or in my case wishing the remaining 3 months to pop would come quickly (Im pes BP)
Hi there, thanks for your message and I'm glad you're reaching out to me. I have this advice for you: what you're experiencing is natural and pretty normal amongst guys who have to do NS. But whether you like it or not, time is going to pass as slowly as it will - it may pass faster when you have fun or when you're busy, but when you're doing something you hate, then it is going to drag on super slowly. You have to accept that in NS that part of the equation is completely out of your control as you have to follow orders as a soldier.
DeleteSo - the only way to take your mind off the outside world is to simply accept that you have to do whatever lies ahead of you for the time you have left in NS. Embrace it with the right spirit - I'm not saying that I enjoyed NS, but I walk away from the experience having grown up a lot and most importantly, I developed a LOT of social skills that proved extremely important and useful to me in my working life. As students, nobody cared about social development but in NS, it is a case of either getting along with those around you or suffering loneliness, possible exclusion or even bullying. In the absence of having any exams to study for, this is an excellent opportunity for you to develop this aspect of your skill set simply by focusing on building relationships with those around you rather than thinking about people like your parents who are not in your immediate environment. Your parents will still be there for you when you get out of camp eventually, but you really need to think about the people around you and focus your energies on them. You may not like them much - but trust me on this one, this is the most important lesson you will take away from the NS experience. Learning to get along with people you may have little in common with or don't even like, but you have no choice but to work/live alongside them. This is a skill that will serve you well in life.
So - take it from me, there's no magic formula to make time fly: it doesn't exist. But you're missing out on a brilliant opportunity to learn so much about developing your social skills by thinking about the world outside your camp when you should be thinking about the people you are seeing everyday in camp.
Not what you want to hear, I know, but trust me, that's the best advice I wish someone gave me back in the day. I somehow managed to figure that one out for myself.