Just been assaulted today in Putney

Hi guys, I had been assaulted today in Putney and I thought, should I even blog about this like that? But I realize that it was going to haunt me anyway regardless of what I do (go shopping, watch TV, do sports etc) so I may as well blog about it and see if my readers can offer me some help and suggestions - I don't believe that a victim like me should suffer in silence. Anyway, I thought I'd let you know what I went through so you could get some insight into how victims of crime in England can react to an attack like that.

I was going to go diving today with my friends at Putney Leisure Centre and I was going to meet my friends at 2 pm at East Putney tube station. I got there earlier than planned - having arrived there at 1:54 pm. I was desperate to go to the toilet and I know there's a car park near the train station. I know that car park was for an office block which would be deserted on a Sunday, so I thought I would nip into the car park, find a quiet corner for a piss and return to the train station to meet my friends (whom I knew were going to be late, due to delays on the trains).

So as I walked into this car park, the first thing I noticed was that there was a woman there (who was using the car park as a short cut between two roads) and that it wasn't as secluded as I had initially thought. That's when I noticed a car drive into the car park and I thought, great - that wasn't a good idea at all, let's just leave. The man in the car got out and shouted at me, "hey! You! Come back!" I was pretty indignant as I didn't do anything wrong at that point - I thought he was shouting at me for trying to piss in the car park. So I shouted back at him, "leave me alone, I didn't do anything."

He was quite persistent and then ran up to me - before I knew it, he had grabbed hold of me and restrained me physically with both hands. He had almost knocked me over in the process and I was in pain. I was taken by shock - and all this time, I thought it was about me trying to piss in his car park. He then said that the burglar alarm in his office had gone off and he had rushed over to investigate - that was when I thought, aaaah so this had nothing to do with my intention to urinate in the car park at all. I protested my innocence and told him that the only reason I was in that car park was to try to find a secluded place to piss as I had just gotten off the train after a long train journey. He said he didn't care about people pissing on the building - this was about people breaking into his office.

He then gave me a rant about crime in the area - his office had been broken into before and he was obviously angry that the police had not yet caught the people who had broken into his office before - and that if I was the burglar he would break my fucking legs. He then said, "let me take your photo - if you have done nothing wrong, then you have nothing to be afraid of." Given how aggressive he had been with me and because he was still holding on to me at that point (he was a lot bigger and stronger than me in fact), I agreed to let him take my photo. It was only then did he let me go. I then said to him, "look, have you called the police? Have you called 999? Do you want me to help you? I was in the car park before you got there, I could have seen something if there really was something I could help?" He said no, I have your photo.

I was shaken by the incident to say the least. I rushed back to my friends at the train station and then I thought, I'd better call the police. I called the police who then said that they will send someone around to me and take a statement. By the time I got to the pool with my friends, we were told that the diving area had been shut because of a faulty diving board - at which point I thought, I just want to go home. It was raining so heavily and I was in no mood for sports at that point after what had happened. I came home and first spoke to a neighbour who is a lawyer to try to understand where I stood from a legal point of view.

She explained that what this man did to me was common assault - he had no right to touch me, never mind restrain me like that. If he had reasonable suspicion that I had done something (eg. if you saw someone climbing out of your kitchen window), then you may have some grounds to try to stop them. But if all I was doing was walking through the car park (which wasn't private property - it was a short cut that many people often took) then he had no justification to restrain me the way he did. She explained that he was probably very frustrated and angry with people having broken into his office before, that was why he was so aggressive but to simply assume my guilt just because I was the first man he saw in the car park - that was unreasonable. He may have been under emotional duress himself, but it still doesn't justify anything he did. And if he tried to do anything with that photo apart from passing it to the police, then he would be the one breaking the law.

The police officer then arrived at my flat and I gave him a very detailed account of everything that had happened. He was very understanding and compassionate - he did also point out that even though I was physically restrained by this man (and threatened with violence), I wasn't hurt or injured. Thus it wasn't a serious case of assault - he has dealt with cases where people are beaten up and there were broken bones and much more serious injuries. It's hardly any comfort to me at this stage, but I have to bear in mind the fact that it could've been so much more serious when you're dealing with a very angry, irrational man who was fed up with his office being broken into on more than one occasion.

I asked him what would happen next - he said as the case took place in the Wandsworth area, it would be Wandsworth police who would take up the investigation to try to identify this man in the blue car who assaulted and threatened me. I would be kept updated as to their investigations - but as of this afternoon, they did NOT receive any reports in the East Putney area with regards to any burglary or break-ins (so one could assume that the security alarm at this man's office had been a false alarm or it may have been tripped by a bird or a rat).

In any case, if there was a break in at the office, then I would be a witness as I was indeed in the area at the time. I wanted to be a responsible citizen and assist in any way I could, as I could have seen or heard something whilst looking around in that car park before that man turned up in his car. I wanted to be treated as a witness and eliminated as a suspect - and my willingness to co-operate with the police thus was a sign of my innocence.

However, short of CCTV evidence or a passerby's eyewitness account, it would then boil down to my word vs his word. The police officer said that if he doesn't admit to physically restraining you the way you described, then it may be hard to bring criminal charges. He did suggest that in some cases similar to this, perhaps a form of resolution would be to get an apology in exchange of an offer not to pursue this case (after all, it was not like he broke my arm or something like that whilst restraining me) and there are several routes this could take depending on them being able to trace the man and how he would react when questioned. Yes there was an old lady in the car park then, but I don't think she stopped to help me - she must have ran away in fright when she saw a confrontation happening.

This is where I have a lesson to share with you my dear readers. I asked the police office what he would have done if he had been in my situation. He said, "rather than let him take my photo, I would've called 999 on the spot and get the police right there, right then I would have then offered to have waited with the man until the police arrived so it would be sorted out with the police right there and then, rather than drag it out into an investigation like that." The other thing I should have done was taken down at least the registration number of his car - but in blind panic, I failed to do so.

Also, another thing I realized is that I am so angry with my friends (who were with me at the train station) right now for not having been even more supportive but I guess it was because I had told them that I was okay (when I really wasn't). I don't know - it probably was my fault but I am just so upset right now I don't want to think about it as I am unable to rationally deal with the matter now.

After the interview with the police officer, I was told to speak to Victim Support who would offer me on going support to deal with the emotional trauma of what I had been through. After the police officer left, I got onto their hot line right away and spoke to someone right away. That was when I broke down and cried with the counselor - I told her that some of my friends had been trying to be supportive but I had lashed out at them, "you weren't there! You had no idea what I went through!" It had been hard for them to try to be supportive when I was in such a distressed state. I have been like a scared animal who would scratch anyone trying to get close to him because I was in distress and panic.

As for how I feel right now, I don't know. This is the last straw that broke the camel's back at the end of a very stressful week. I am alternating between feeling okay and feeling angry - I suppose a large part of it stems from me feeling that I could've and should've handled that situation a lot better, but hindsight is 2020. If I had known that this man was confronting me about the security alarm in his office going off, then I would have reacted very differently in the first place. It may not have been as ugly - but I didn't even hear any kind of alarm or siren as I stood in that car park.

But there you go. I was half wondering if I should blog about this and I thought, it's going to be on my mind whether I blog about it or not and since I am going to be bothered by it, I may as well write about it.